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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: For Youdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jaycee
    ASL Info:    44/F/ Texas
    Elite Ratio:    5.27 - 2626/1259/187
    Words: 71
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 533
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 449



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFor Youdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I wrote you a poem, today,
    But I didn't post it.
    Some words are best left unwritten
    Some emotions left hidden
    Heart secrets--
    To be whispered or not.

    Beautiful, beautiful you,
    Don't shout at my heart.
    Fractures already craze it.
    Careful, Pandora,
    It holds many secrets.

    I wrote a poem for you,
    But some words are better left. ...




    Submitted on 2015-04-04 01:07:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Looks like you wrote two about em now lol.
    | Posted on 2015-04-16 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      You have quite a style to your writing. i wonder what sort of mind calls to this type of prose. This is the second time you have surprised me. I have no advice for I have little to compare you to.
    | Posted on 2015-04-06 00:00:00 | by Silver20G | [ Reply to This ]
      I like it. At one time or another, we all reach a point where we feel that saying something more is saying a little less. Good or bad, we choose to hold it for another day...or maybe, forever.

    I did see one thing that I think you might want to adjust...
    Line 9: "alresdy" to "already"

    Until again,

    K
    | Posted on 2015-04-04 00:00:00 | by krs3332003 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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