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So many things have happened,
in every way I'm scarred.
I'd hoped that once I got here
things wouldn't be so hard.

I've never been so lost,
even when I had a crutch;
It kills me to be so aware
of how deeply I've lost touch.

I don't recognize myself
and I don't like who I see,
I'm defined by all that I hold back
and that used to not be me.

I'm so fearful of falling down,
but secretly hope I will
because I can't bear to stagnate
but can't stop from standing still.

Adulthood hasn't brought peace,
just distance from my rage.
It's only made me passive,
to feel safe in this cage.

Where's that flame that used to burn?
that passion deep inside?
where's that drive for action
Have I taken my last ride?

I used to never have regrets,
but now they weigh me down.
I'm a king whose castle burns
barely clinging to his crown.

I used to be the rebel
destroying all monarchy,
but like all revolutions do
I've embodied tyranny.