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    dots Submission Name: Man in the Moon Outeddots

    Author: RamSlade
    Elite Ratio:    2.55 - 4/3/3
    Words: 91
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 701
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 598


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    dotsMan in the Moon Outeddots

    the unusual seems to want tender
    beneath a full moon breakable
    a careful cloud scuttles across its anxious
    angels flying hushed tonight
    when the time is compliant they will bring their fragile
    deposit careful kisses upon his clever
    before they leave they take them back blushing
    the moon tames the clouds and shines naughtily
    a tear in the corner of his precious
    man in the moon has removed himself from the closet
    telling the stars curious and cleverly
    that he waits
    for the cow that jumped over the moon

    Submitted on 2015-04-29 16:24:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    3: meh!
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    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      As it turns out, I had mistaken this poem for another by remembering solely the last line!
    Either way, both were memorable for me...
    Currently wondering if I've got a thing for the lunar idea.
    The rhythm of this was almost suspenseful, if that makes sense. I wanted to go on; figure it out. The ending struck me at a personal level, yet I'm not sure why. It's not like I'm one for reasoning, anyway, but you know.
    It played like a movie - a really interesting animation composed by snippets, rather than a time-line. It continued to time-skip and you had no idea where you were at till it closed up and suddenly it all made sense.
    I just thought you could use a word or two in case you had any questions about the reader's perspective.
    Enjoyed it, overall.
    | Posted on 2015-05-14 00:00:00 | by MyPeriodical | [ Reply to This ]

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