I Say

Author: Teofila ASL Info:    17, F, with the wolves Elite Ratio:    0.4 - 210 /104 /71 Words: 34

Class/Type: Misc /Misc Total Views: 1738 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 218

Description:

---

I Say

---

Whisper dirty secrets in my ear Lets pretend there's no one here make me clutch the sheets Dont stop until I scream Love me harder all the way and dont stop until I say...

Submitted on 2015-05-13 18:56:44     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_< 2: I dunno... 3: meh! 4: Pretty cool 5: Wow!

Comments

The whispers of dirty secrets in my ear let me pretend there is no one there and let me wet these satin sheets as night sweats are my delusion. Do not stop, I shall not scream love is harder to take, is it not if a pass, a fancy given-some do not stop, do not love me.

| Posted on 2015-05-25 00:00:00 | by poetotoe | [ Reply to This ]

sad

| Posted on 2015-05-19 00:00:00 | by poetotoe | [ Reply to This ]

Is this supposed to be a time-line? I supposed so, as I read, because it just randomly skipped from being set in public to being set in private; as I assume the sheets are placed on the bed + located in a bed-room. Didn't like how short it was, felt like a message meant to be sent through SMS/IMming. Try a little more vocab and some punctuation.

| Posted on 2015-05-14 00:00:00 | by MyPeriodical | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest. 2. Try not to give only compliments. 3. How did it make you feel? 4. Why did it make you feel that way? 5. Which parts? 6. What distracted from the piece?

7. What was unclear? 8. What does it remind you of? 9. How could it be improved? 10. What would you have done differently? 11. What was your interpretation of it? 12. Does it feel original?

200239