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    dots Submission Name: could i love youdots

    Author: robbie
    ASL Info:    20/m/mi
    Elite Ratio:    2.82 - 53/52/31
    Words: 277
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 784
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1459


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    dotscould i love youdots

    can I say I love you and mean what I say
    give it some time and yes one day
    your exactly who I'd want to have by my side
    these feelings for you I find hard to hide
    the smile on my face
    the way my heart starts to race
    to hear your laugh and to see you smile
    makes my mind start to race a mile
    could I fall in love with you
    yes I wont lie it is very true
    every thing I look for right before my eyes
    how could I ever risk even telling you a lie
    words pour from my heart as I write
    to set eyes on you would be a beautiful sight
    but still im here in my mind
    wondering could I love you
    and I think yes this love could be true
    give up all that I have for something more
    for some one I can truly adore
    for some one I could love and cherish
    and I can see this would be the love to never perish
    I could write about how I can see this is right
    to be in love with you at the end of the night
    but these are things I must leave unsaid
    this is just some things going through my head
    could I love you of course I could
    I would treat you like a real man should
    I'd strive to make your dreams come true
    I promise I'll be the man to do that for you
    could I love you yes I could
    id treat you every day the way a real man should

    Submitted on 2015-08-12 23:37:00     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      thank you both for the comments and it means a lot to me,
    | Posted on 2016-03-30 00:00:00 | by robbie | [ Reply to This ]
    I always smile when I see what I consider old-timers are on the site. I'm surprised by how many of us keep cropping up on the Community Page. Happy New Near! Now for the poem:

    I read Jaz's review and I agree with her comments, but I took this as coming from a different place perhaps. To me this feels like the beginning of a relationship with someone that you think may be "it." It's the thought that, "Yes, I could be the one for you, but I'm not really sure that I'm ready to say it. I'm not really sure that you're ready to hear it." It's vulnerable in its hesitation, but it's also incredibly strong in its surety and promises.
    It's almost as if you've known this person as a friend, but now are seeing her in a new light as something more. That may be my own projection from my own life experience, but that's the great thing about poetry. Even our most personal pieces, can be picked up by someone else and hold special meaning for them.
    | Posted on 2016-01-07 00:00:00 | by jaycee | [ Reply to This ]
      I think the strong aspect of this is how much you were able to say concerning the one thought, could I love you? The diversity gives it a well rounded aspect and is a characteristic of a well written piece. I loved some of the traditional elements you brought up, cherishing her, protecting her. I don't think that women should ever compromise their will or self care to serve a man but at the same time when the man deserves it I believe it is a well balanced relationship and a sign of mature love, with both passion and principle. You seem certain and ready and not saying so out loud makes it vulnerable and valuable. It seems here you know how to treat a woman, that you understand her purity and have the intention of keeping that sacred part of a girl intact. Many blessings in this union!
    | Posted on 2015-10-29 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]

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