Photo in Berlin

Author: Angeles Elite Ratio:    3.87 - 5 /13 /19 Words: 101

Class/Type: Poetry /Passion Total Views: 1807 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 607

Description:

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Photo in Berlin

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Who took a picture in the shade Of you; stripped down, As close to naked as I will see? The navy poka-dot bra Is something you haven't changed. You left it there for me to find As much as I could be anyone. Not to hurt or soothe me, For nothing new about you Would care to be alone In my possesion. No, the light in there will fade Like a nostalgic dream. And I won't let myself ponder over this Even as I search it in the shade, To hurt myself And wonder where you got such courage.

Submitted on 2015-08-31 17:13:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments

concur all above… and plus also, (and plus also the above will understand clumsiness) i like the clumsiness. i found there was an unexpected/unlooked for naive nuance to this that suggests young years with an adult taste for lost or temporarily missing decadence. i just think this illustrates the fact that poetry is or can be in equal parts uplifting and frustrating and i find this awkwardness when written down to be entirely to my own taste and style. i could advise/revise and all that blah but for now for me theres no need: you've somehow set a moment of importance in clumsy amber and that will do.

| Posted on 2015-10-05 00:00:00 | by Awkward | [ Reply to This ]

I like this although with the tense work it is a little difficult to follow- but (as far as i understood it) i thought it was a strong poem- kind of like the narrator was the darkroom or the liquid or the process - so close but uninvolved and i think that's high marks for developing that perspective. Close- with what seems to be a real knowledge of the subject/person but alienated by that distance - so - antiquated in a sense while this spirit moves on with her evolution, the last line is as good as anything you could want to read. If i wrote it, I'd be proud to have written this poem, a poem so loaded it's really a treat for the reader.

| Posted on 2015-09-03 00:00:00 | by Daniel Barlow | [ Reply to This ]

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