Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Neblinadots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Erinmaya47
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 1/0/1
    Words: 145
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 753
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 903



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsNeblinadots
    -------------------------------------------


    In the grey of the morning
    I heard the only cry of a bird.
    Or is it the sound of a child
    Then you were on piece of a torn bag
    Freezing...
    Getting bluer by the minute.
    The I realised!
    I found a pair of scissors and thread/ string
    Checked you and cut the connection.
    Buried the rubbish;
    Washed your mother
    And then you - so blue!
    I wrapped you up in cloth
    And took you to your mother.

    All the time you tried to cry
    But I told you "Shut up. People are listening."
    And silently, without words I said
    "Your own uncles hate your mother
    For bringing you into this world.
    Make it easier for her by shutting up.
    And you've never cried since that
    Early Saturday morning at 5 am 9th April 2016.
    Thus you are will be called Neblina.




    Submitted on 2016-04-13 17:27:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    201203

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    The Promise written by annie0888
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    This written by Chelebel
    Push written by JanePlane
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Linger written by saartha
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Giving written by jjd
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    In My Head written by faideddarkness

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry