very short and with a lot of meanning for us .. well.. i found myself in the butterfly .. i love it ... anyway good wording and metaphros .. structure excellent .. and .. just ckeep on writng and dont forget to check my writings peace and love victor!
The butterfly is the ultimate symbol of transformation in many cultures. Beginning as an egg,like most animals, then the stuggle of the larval stage-preparing for something that lies hidden to the self at this point. but nonetheless forging ahead driven by unseen forces and basic instinct-survivng. Then the going within-developing one's own personal traits, and finally emerging as yourself. We all know and accept this to some degree, and countless poems and essays have addressed this transformation. So this may be a poem, or a random thought, and the theme may at first seem cliché-but the brevity with which you present it is perfect as it zooms on your thought-which ISN'T cliché at all. Who ever thinks about the butterfliy as being lonely ? We are awed by their beauty and grace and often use the metaphor to show spiritual transformation, or freedom from cares after a long struggle,-but so far only YOU -in my experience has evoked any empathy for the creature's innate solitary nature. The winged butterfly, flitting about and flying effortlessy throughout summer skies brings joy and beauty to the beholder. I am certain they feel only joy and exhilaration the first time they spread those wings and fly. You give human attributes to the butterfly here, by suggesting that they may be sad and lonely to have no one to share this joy with. But I think you do this to compare man's motives and goals to those of the rest of creation. Consider the beautiful starlet, the inspired rock-singer, the self-made millionaire-those who "have it all"-who never feel that joy, The difference is that the forces that propel the butterflies life are totally selfless, and therefore if they seem "lonely" to us it is only because we think as humans -"what a pity".
The butterfly's ceaseless cycle of self transformation and resultant joy is a lesson to we mere mortals, to know thyself, follow your heart, and share the result of your efforts,-your own special light with the world , never caring during your progress, or about how others may feel or react.
Your brief submission here, echoes plaintively the lesson of the butterfly. This is your thought, your light your beautiful- insight ,-and you shared it without being constrained about other's criticism or commentary. Butterflies don't need approval or love as we know it any more than they need galoshes -it is we humans who need these things and therefore are the ones to be pitied for the price we pay for our priveledged postion in this kingdom.
I liked the thought Angela, and think it stirred up some feelings in many-and that's all well and good. Take Care. Silver
It seems that you DO have a thing for amazingly short poetry. I am unaware of how old you are, but I am assuming that you have written a great deal of papers from school english class, history, writing.... anything... I am just wondering if the papers that you wrote for the teachers were as short as the ones on this web site. It seems that you are very confident with getting the point across in so little amount of time... I can never do that. Perhaps it is that I over do all ove my writing-- or am just insecure that my audience will not be able to understand that I am talking about. hmmm...
I do not write for anyone except myself. I am who I am. I offer more encouragment to others than I take for myself. That is even the point of this piece...unshared beauty. When a wonderful (or terrible) event happens in our lives and we have NO ONE to tell...that is lonliness. If no one comments on this piece...I do not care. Never have, never will. I expect that from life.
I wanted to clarify this. I felt a need to defend myself and my poetic form. Minimalism is not a cop out. Some people cannot write like this. I force nothing. I state my words and move along...
Don't kick me in the nuts for saying this. But I feel the only true butterflys out there are the women that don't soak themselves in hairspray, drench themselves in perfume and cake their faces in make up. Perhaps ultimately the ugly and obese are the lonely, but a due process would let the conformers feel what the lonely feel. I'm drinking, give me a break. MyX
You've inspired another poem; "lepidopterists are rare". Thank you... Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
It's a pity that the butterfly's transition from caterpillar to moth is so short. If Only we could retreat back into a cocoon when things get tough or when no one can see us... at least there's sancticity. This is really stark, with the butterfly's splendour not hiding detracting from that at all...
I must say that I haven't seen too many butterflies flying in pairs. However, I have seen many people stand in awe of the butterflly's fluttering in the breeze. ~Aaron
Whoa, I never thought of it like that. Butterfly emerging from the cacoon to a emtpy world that is 100xs as vast since it's size is small...but I think about it and realize that they're pretty much alone beforehand anyways...so I would think they're already used to it...Of coarse if you don't take this literally I totally get that message too..thats one thing I like about your stuff is that it can be literal or not...Like I said I like to look at things in a literal sense...Well anyways I liked this poem it reminded me of a Man named Waylon Mercy...who said "What a beautiful butterfly...landing in the palm of my hand, with wings made out of angeldust...I love you" Then he crushed the butterfly and started crying...Waylon Mercy...
i love the melancholy feel of this... i can't help it, i am a sucker for melancholy... this made me think of the cocoons we had in my class for the kids, and we watched them emerge as butterflies. one of the butterflies had a wounded wing, so when we let them go, this one couldn't fly. one of the others stayed behind and wouldn't leave either. i took them out to the flowers blooming in the front of the building and set the injured one on a flower petal. his buddy hung around for a bit and then flew away... i thought about that poor lonely wounded butterfly all weekend... anyway, this is really simple and beautifully written, angela. my only suggestion might be to change "its" to "her" or "his." just seems more personal to me. as always, though, i love your minimalism!
This is really nice. I think we've all known someone like this. I've even felt like this. You do put a lot of emotion into such a short poem. It should be "its" though.
i think you wrapped the feeling up into one beautiful tiny package...this was sad, but the image of a butterfly made the feeling turn hopeful and sweet...as the understanding of the beautiful wings that will soon fly into friendship found me smiling...nice work!
thats a desolate feeling. You finally find beauty in yourself, and then, they're is noone to share it with...great timing world, I almost feel sorrow for the butterfly now, if I wasn't so jealous. Good thought here, thanks for sharing.
This is a very good idea Angela, but I would prefer it to open either as Lonliness is like a butterfly, or lonliness is a butterfly. It seems like that helps the sentence structure of this one sentence poem.
a lot to think about and a lot covered in just that little bit of poetry. its true, we all do look for someone to share anything and everything with. nice job.
Submission Name: unshared beauty
