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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: His Handsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Janesaddiction
    ASL Info:    48/F/Somewhere on A1A
    Elite Ratio:    2.01 - 8/24/16
    Words: 197
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1034
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1219



    Description:
       In memory of my father on his birthday. I miss you.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHis Handsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    The gift of life was given me,
    but on no ordinary day,
    Fitting perfectly in the palm of his hand,
    he always used to say

    A man, larger than life
    who held me with such care
    With hands so strong, yet gentle
    knowing he’d always be there

    Hands that kept me entertained
    as I grew, year by year
    My wonder at the secret trick
    when a coin appeared, from behind my ear

    Those sick days when my ear would hurt
    his warm hands would stop the ache
    Simply no one else would do
    cause that’s a magic you just can’t fake

    Hands that clearly sent a message
    when a boy came ‘round to date
    His handshake told of consequences
    if I was even a minute late

    Hands that applauded my accomplishments
    and folded when I needed prayer
    I knew those hands would comfort me
    were I ever in despair.

    And in that comfort, I was held, until we said goodbye
    solace in the notion that beside him again I will stand
    For passage to the other side is His promise of our journey
    together, hand in hand.





    Submitted on 2016-05-30 01:38:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Very nice, indeed.
    | Posted on 2016-06-11 00:00:00 | by poetotoe | [ Reply to This ]
      
    Hands that applauded my accomplishments
    and folded when I needed prayer

    Yes. You were blessed to have this. I don't know how to critique the emotion that comes from such a deep loss.

    Thank you for sharing this.
    | Posted on 2016-06-10 00:00:00 | by JanePlane | [ Reply to This ]
      I loved the ending and the way the poem spoke of fond memories. I think the only thing that I would probably work on here is rhyme scheme. I actually hate rhyming poetry, so I think to an extent it did get its point across, but I think that you could have dug a little deeper. Your first stanza and your last stanzas were the strongest. Just keep these type of emotions up front; the rawness of them is to be applauded.
    | Posted on 2016-05-30 00:00:00 | by Brwnsknsam05 | [ Reply to This ]


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