Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Rightdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: saartha
    ASL Info:    27/F/US
    Elite Ratio:    4.03 - 230/389/136
    Words: 293
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1198
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1154



    Description:
       Going through kind of a phase right now with conversational poetry, after reading Marilyn Krysl's Diana Lucifera.

    Is that what you call this type? Conversational? I don't know. Anyway, bear with me.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRightdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Here's the bad news:
    tomorrow
    there will be a bird
    on your doorstep.
    Dead or dying, you think
    it has something to do
    with me. It does not.

    There's the crux
    you always think
    the bird should rise up
    and proclaim its killer,
    its savior, should point out
    which cat only watched and which
    opened its mouth; which cat
    is not a cat but a storm
    or a window or another bird

    and to be honest,
    I would like these things too.

    But it owes us only its death,
    incapable of shaming
    our compulsive involvement,
    our need to make the bird
    about ourselves.

    You want to be jury
    in an empty room. You want
    to hold court
    for every little thing
    that makes you feel.



    The good news:
    walking in the woods,
    there were no birds left alive,
    not one.




    Submitted on 2016-06-18 19:29:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This poem has a quiet way of encapsulating a very specific tic in the human condition. It calls forth our unreasonable (presented by The Masses as Highly Necessary and Reasonable) desire to put our own stamp on everything; to file, classify, personify; to stake a claim, plant a flag, dig a well on any thing we ascribe meaning to.

    I think you must read Alan Watts, and maybe study Zen. Your words are infused with a subtle humility, and yet a pervasive desire to persuade the reader to separate words from meanings, and meanings from pseudo-meanings.

    This is life, and while it sounds soft and surreal, truly it is monumental; large and all-encompassing.

    You want to be jury
    in an empty room. You want
    to hold court
    for every little thing
    that makes you feel.

    Yes, YES! this is exultant, lovely, and true as the skeleton under the skin.

    Your last clause though, makes me wonder what you mean.

    :)

    Erin



    | Posted on 2016-09-04 00:00:00 | by BlankSheet | [ Reply to This ]
      It's always a treat when you post.
    | Posted on 2016-07-03 00:00:00 | by Daniel Barlow | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    201339

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    All Time Low written by Janesaddiction
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Genesis written by saartha
    Born of the Mouth written by MyPeriodical
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Faith In Line written by MyPeriodical
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    Limbo written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry