Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Freshwaterdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Narna
    Elite Ratio:    1.74 - 14/102/68
    Words: 109
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 979
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 726



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFreshwaterdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Clouds close in; thunder breaks.
    We take shelter beneath the rock face,
    stealing looks between sets of five foot waves.
    Rain; cascading over the entrance of our cave;
    has settled on the bridge of your nose.
    Rock pools double in size,
    ripple with the weight of the sky.
    We leave no room for conversation.
    The music of the ocean; a love song
    on repeat;
    Drowning regret and expectation.
    I imagine lying back and floating on to the horizon.
    Our limbs interlocked, forming a raft.
    Our bodies seemingly weightless,
    drifting with the current.
    I'll cling to you and this moment; or else
    be swept away with the tide.




    Submitted on 2016-07-11 23:02:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      To find such a person to write such beautiful poetry about is one of life's wonderful perks.

    I have often felt that being swept away by the mere presence of someone special would be difficult to put to words...and yet you have accomplished with words what many of us can only imagine.

    May I say, I am a little envious? May I say, the object of your poem is very lucky? Forgive me, but I guess the aforementioned questions have already been asked before permission was granted to ask them.

    Each of us need to experience what you have written here at some point in our life...if for only but a moment.

    Thanks you for sharing - and for taking me somewhere very special...

    K
    | Posted on 2016-07-17 00:00:00 | by krs3332003 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    201393

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Incubus written by monad
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    ME written by jjd
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Giving written by jjd
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    untitled written by Chelebel
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry