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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Scars You Beautifuldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Chelebel
    Elite Ratio:    1.96 - 47/165/170
    Words: 75
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 642
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 718



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsScars You Beautifuldots
    -------------------------------------------


    To be placed within a position
    of the shadows.

    How doors close and thoughts
    project into the universe.
    Stars colliding with the darkness.
    Black holes engulfing other worlds.
    Space a time continuum.
    Destiny marked by sunlight
    and the distance between.
    Fate decided by the dividing cells.


    And even the shadows
    Are afraid of the dark.










    Submitted on 2017-02-06 21:14:19     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I find the whole thing thoroughly thoughtful:

    How doors close and thoughts
    project into the universe.

    Critically: The above 2 lines are pretty spectacular, the physical abutting the spiritual...

    I don't know if you have achieved that throughout the poem. I'm not saying race and edit it... certainly there's plenty to be explored as it stands. I'm saying: consider it.

    Here:

    Destiny marked by little giggles.
    Fate decided by the dividing cells.

    you're placing something trivial beside something divine. That's great smithing of words. giggles gives me the shits. squiggles is equally mere, and rather thought provoking.

    To be placed within a position
    of the shadows.

    How doors close and thoughts
    project into the universe.
    Stars colliding with the darkness.
    Black holes engulfing other worlds.
    Space a time continuum.
    Destiny marked by little squiggles.
    Fate decided by the dividing cells.


    And even the shadows are
    Afraid of the dark.

    You have a brain. Decide for yourself.

    I applaud this effort. Best block of words I've seen from you. If you agree create another page and devote that to doodling, on this page remember your last work.

    Sincerely, awesome from you.
    | Posted on 2017-02-07 00:00:00 | by Daniel Barlow | [ Reply to This ]


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