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    dots Submission Name: Afterdots

    Author: JanePlane
    ASL Info:    125/F/everyplane
    Elite Ratio:    6.76 - 419/435/131
    Words: 386
    Class/Type: Misc/Serious
    Total Views: 1391
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2394


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    At first her words were flat and weak.
    Later in the night a sound like drowning
    rose up from her depths
    Wave after wave from a sea of loss.

    And then once, her lips trembled and a whisper came,

    “I know why he came,” she said,
    "He came to save my life."

    And then from an even smaller place,
    "I just don’t know why he left."

    So young.
    He was only 24.
    Her firstborn.

    She told of the moment of his conception when she knew she was pregnant. How it was in an instant and how she felt filled with warmth and light inside her womb. And then when he died, how she stood in her mother’s garden and felt that same light and warmth in her chest--her heart and how Olivia said she was his light-bearer

    Pictures later showed her two children
    wrapped in blankets or being superheros together
    or smiling with flower pots on their heads
    The raising of boys I thought
    The rising of a son

    One day she unwrapped
    bobbles of brightly colored blown glass
    that he had created and she had found in his house.
    They shown-- dappled in sunlight on her newly cleaned porch.
    But she outshined the glass.
    I marveled at her.
    The dancing hands.
    How they would glide from piece to piece.
    The serenity that had washed over her face.
    The evenness of her lips.

    That day she brought out his clothes
    and breathed them in
    Like she was taking in some drug
    Pulling him into her lungs
    Even if he killed her there--his clothes could still carry the virus that ended him
    “I will never smell him again,” she said.
    Placid. Steady. Sure.
    “Some things are worth dying for.”

    From the kitchen then,
    We heard a piece he had made and let me have
    (for a price)
    to the ground.
    I took it as a message to me
    that he didn’t want me to have it
    or that he didn’t want me there.

    But now I think it was a command.
    "Watch my mother!
    Guard her.
    Keep her safe.
    WAKE UP!
    This is killing her.
    DON’T LET IT!"

    Submitted on 2017-02-19 02:26:44     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is light (shimmers) and heavy (feeling) all at the same time, like a rainbow prism through a teardrop. I like people that can turn tragedies into words. You're obviously one of those people. Hi.
    | Posted on 2017-03-29 00:00:00 | by WriteSomething | [ Reply to This ]
      To be quite honest, I almost never comment on prose. I should be ashamed since I have posted it here once or twice.

    I enjoyed your piece, I can certainly relate to it. Someone close passed away not long ago so I can understand the feeling of despair and confusion that is triggered after a family members meets their demise. It is downright baffling how and when death happens sometimes, particularly when it is unexpected.

    Yesterday, I went on a bike ride a bit far from where I live and got a tyre punctured. Then, I realised my pump was not working either and on top of that my earphones were broken. It might seem ridiculous, but I began to think that maybe those things happened consecutively for a reason, like to stop something from coming to pass ....perhaps it was pure coincidence and I'm just rambling, as matter of course. But what if one of those things could have been different .... would that have altered something .... I would never know ...

    I'm very sorry for your loss I hope you can find peace,
    Kind regards :)

    Ethan Brody
    | Posted on 2017-02-28 00:00:00 | by Ethan Brody | [ Reply to This ]

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