Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Keepdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: TheStillSilence
    ASL Info:    20/F/Out in Outer Space
    Elite Ratio:    5.1 - 180/107/54
    Words: 143
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1102
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 907



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsKeepdots
    -------------------------------------------


    You're not you anymore.
    Your elated eyes and smirking smile;
    Your witty words and teasing touch
    These are all mine to keep

    The same shoes guide your feet,
    But you stand differently in them
    Your expressions are foreign
    and your voice lands strangely in my ears

    I linger on the memory of your hips
    swinging me gently to a loud rhythm
    But those hips have faded
    and are replaced by a warm body amongst hundreds on the street

    I've lay wrapped in the soft sweater you're wearing
    But now it's just Macy's Item: 465268;
    Your jeans are just a pair of Levi Classic Wash;
    And your coat gets lost in the sea of grey New York

    You're not you anymore.
    The you that I loved has stayed behind in my memories
    And he is all mine to keep.




    Submitted on 2017-09-24 23:50:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    201950

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Incubus written by monad
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    This written by Chelebel
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry