I truly liked this, It has an airiness about it. That is a really good thing, and one i cant myself capture. I can almost picture your person lying there. The only thing that bugged me and trust me it is hardly worth mentioning is the very last part. its off.. in my opinion. maybe it's the way the other parts rymed and it does not. you used talk twice..which is fine , but when you are reading it , that part disrupted the flow. Anyway again hardly worth the mention considering i enjoyed your work so much.