Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Unfortunate Realitydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: TeslaKoyal
    Elite Ratio:    1.76 - 19/70/88
    Words: 84
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 664
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 553



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsUnfortunate Realitydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Freedom is blood stained
    At the mercy of others
    They all lie and deceive
    While they work undercover
    And babies are born dead
    At the will of their mothers
    In the filthy abandoned homes
    Left for druggies to govern
    There's no life in these places
    No good deeds to take over
    So for now they walk lifeless
    And await to be smothered
    By the ways they have chosen
    In this world full of colors
    But they'll never see them
    With no chance to discover




    Submitted on 2018-06-14 01:24:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Good write. A good description of atrocious and poignant world which is unlike the world of colors which will remain undiscovered to this life less world.
    | Posted on 2018-09-03 00:00:00 | by Ramneet | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    202139

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Sweet You written by Daniel Barlow
    Wisp of You written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Hazy Half-Moon written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Rough written by saartha
    The written by Hazy skies
    For serious written by Daniel Barlow
    Collision written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Cannot Assimilate written by Daniel Barlow
    Spaces written by Daniel Barlow
    Tidal written by OneDarkFlame92
    Terrified part three written by MyPeriodical
    untitled#1 written by Daniel Barlow
    your feet, your flared nostrils, your forearms written by Daniel Barlow
    Luchinushka written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Forms and girders written by Daniel Barlow
    Something Spoken written by Daniel Barlow
    like any good spartan written by Daniel Barlow
    Ballad written by Daniel Barlow
    being direct, it's written by Daniel Barlow
    Emotions written by taintedsmiles
    Merge written by saartha
    a trish poem written by Daniel Barlow
    Starry night written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Sun-meeting written by Daniel Barlow
    Things become tangled written by Daniel Barlow
    Roots written by Chelebel
    Within a structure written by Daniel Barlow
    Position written by Daniel Barlow
    Beloved written by Daniel Barlow
    Repetition written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry