Hooked on a feeling

Author: OneDarkFlame92 ASL Info:    23/m/Numeanor Elite Ratio:    5.3 - 461 /425 /227 Words: 111

Class/Type: Misc /Misc Total Views: 1073 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 807

Description:

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Hooked on a feeling

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it's an alarm clock radio it's a July afternoon with no air conditioning it's a stale burrito it's a long walk at eleven at night it's a black and mild cigar it's the smell if tobacco and vanilla it's the pine tree in the backyard it's the oak tree in the front yard it's a bunk bed, a rusty swing set, a flat football it's October at night and it's still warm outside it's spaghetti again without meatballs this time it's walking home from school it's the long way it's cheap beer in the fridge it's only three o'clock it's empty cans on the table it's only three o'clock

Submitted on 2019-05-02 22:12:12     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments

I loved this, just when it was in the pits the pits got deeper. You made this work in so many wonderful ways. Bravo to you, this was wonderful!

| Posted on 2019-05-23 00:00:00 | by Forgiven | [ Reply to This ]

seems like the feeling is disappointment or maybe i'm getting this wrong. that's all i can make of it from the title. i guess most people could relate to this. the repetition worked.

| Posted on 2019-05-03 00:00:00 | by cornonthekob | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest. 2. Try not to give only compliments. 3. How did it make you feel? 4. Why did it make you feel that way? 5. Which parts? 6. What distracted from the piece?

7. What was unclear? 8. What does it remind you of? 9. How could it be improved? 10. What would you have done differently? 11. What was your interpretation of it? 12. Does it feel original?

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