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    dots Submission Name: Agency(grandiose delusion)dots

    Author: cornonthekob
    Elite Ratio:    6.17 - 672/498/459
    Words: 427
    Class/Type: Story/Serious
    Total Views: 75
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2750


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAgency(grandiose delusion)dots

    you're somewhere else yet here at the same time
    i don't need to see you to know you're something i've imagined
    but like a pestering itch i can't relieve myself of you
    i'm swept into the fantasy, sleeping at the agency

    i'd love to know a series of events you haven't noticed
    i'd rather be allowed to experience the normal for once
    the same story of chemical imbalance
    is the easiest to tell so i'll give you a hunch

    i'm up by lunch with a notion that won't take me far
    the movement of the ocean infects another scar
    and now i'm alone afraid of some disease
    asking reality for something to believe

    someone mark the statue, history is written by sinners
    i don't mean to be severe, but humans are liars
    what's the difference between two sides
    if they both incur the same level of harm

    don't get me wrong i don't understand
    all that i know are the forms in the sand
    and i can mix my metaphors well enough to believe
    i'd have something to say if i knew how to stand

    history is violently played out through our lives
    and we grant weak copies for our children and strangers to develop
    enough to let them know we've seen a light
    and sweet enough to let us think we know the dangers

    but you here now, is all i need to be alone
    the humming of a fan, it's a song that i know
    i'll practice-make-perfect
    untill we both get it
    i'm not denying that miracles happen
    i just don't think anything caused them
    just benefecial anomalies
    that mean more among the destruction

    i left the world little artifact
    and now i have to prove my worth to strangers
    the shades are drawn wide open
    and i can't let you see the anger,
    i'm suppose to be where i'm headed
    and i decided to make it rough
    so i made up the rules
    and learned how to give a fuck

    the littlest thing, the song you don't sing
    gives me and answer for what i believe
    i know your responses and i understand your devices well
    if i'm a little bit confused, there's no need to dwell

    help me out of helpless hoping
    needless forms and thoughts imagined
    i'll get out in time next evening
    just to greet the world i live in

    you are just a construct
    you won't be hurt without me
    this is just another mind fuck
    emotion mixed with memory

    Submitted on 2020-08-17 14:26:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||


    Allow me to be precisely surgical
    toward a skewed perception of me.

    I'll begin with why the word "Agency"
    is suggested as a title directed at someone who could be, "Faking it until they're making it":

    "This guy doesn't know anything.
    He's covered in pretentious flames."

    Okay. Reasonable stance
    for my mesomorphic appearance
    and wannabe rap slayer timeline
    of an unlearned past.

    Now ...

    Why the piece does not slap.
    Why the piece does not stick.
    And I'll sharply give "real life"
    facts on why all of it is untrue.

    The title makes a grand entrance itself;
    As it is carried by parenthesis.
    Meaning the intent is more present.
    If I was directing a diss or what have you
    I probably would have done the same.
    Nonetheless, I'm not letting you off the hook due to the nerve that is present.
    Even when the light of accepting it makes
    it way to show off it's rays as architecturally intelligent.

    Here's the juice
    for your relentless crusade:

    Getting past gatekeepers
    within most traditional publishing
    is never ever easy. Especially for an Oet.
    You have to literally pitch yourself to "Agents" who also line you up for more rejection based on your voice
    and ethnic background.
    Even if you get a foot in,
    someone controls the checks and balances on making you take a seat to beg them-
    To hand over your soul that gives them the rights to all blood that was turned into ink.

    If one is looking for traditional "Agencies"
    to give over anything eligible then
    the author is obviously willing
    to have less creative control.
    So dealing with an Agency at first is only okay when you haven't been schooled about self publishing which is a better option, than being anal raped by an "Agency" that had no intent
    to invest any real money into them.
    Despite offering a two year contract
    and a two time royalty payment
    That would seem like every blue moon.

    I mean Rupi Kaur is considered a terrible practitioner as for my personal opinion;
    but has a fanbase that started where many
    (including myself) began - On Instagram.
    Which would explain why people would even add hashtags to their works.
    A clear clue it was shown
    through some social media platform.
    I have a self ridden problem with using
    old social media type writings on here.
    Which is one reason why I had them removed.
    It's like handing somebody a day old cheeseburger when you know you could just give them fresh market produce
    out the trunk of your car.
    That's why ... I found it better to switch away from that style, no matter how much I conveyed the darkness of American society

    An author like Kaur is more famous for consistency of the intelligence toward self publishing than creating anything but bland repackaged sentences to further the strange idea of love poems being oppressive when they are depressingly lazy.
    If you look at the work of Lana Del Rey's
    recent stuff;
    It may startle someone that her contributions are for more unique than what Kaur can give in the next five years.

    I say this from absolute experience
    of submitting work to places
    I looked at intensely.

    For instance.
    I've submitted work before-
    strictly to Rattle Magazine.
    Only to be rejected twice.
    Copper Canyon Press
    doesn't want you.
    And the venues
    might want you recorded
    at the time you call wrong.
    Even when I didn't lack substance.
    Even when I was using Instagram
    to show 2017 work, because I had to taste what my work did to people, at a time
    when I only had about thirty followers.
    I went through all of that
    Only to almost have been burnt out.
    Right after getting the hell off of Instagram.
    From trying to catapult incorrectly,
    due to wandering from scene to scene that dried up; whereas some of those people became faculty teachers, some just activists with years worth of Tweets.
    Some of them even discouraged from writing; to where they stopped showing up to workshops because they knew about "Gatekeepers".
    And no one knew what happened to them.

    In my case.
    I still either viewed an absolute anomaly
    or an "Exotic" that would have to be made-over by editors who didn't envision what I did. Now phone calls get ignored.
    I was only looking to reach out to so many people who were connected to institutions,
    because being young, there was the rush
    to position oneself to no true avail.
    So you start off chasing it
    but then end up trying to figure out
    why all the restrictions are there.
    No matter how many other "Poets"
    you hung out with.

    The word "Agency": To those of us out here,
    who cannot be classified as "Poets"
    due to academic preferences and
    upsetting standards; is a gunline.
    It intensified a damn war that many, many
    online poets of site communities do not even realize takes place.
    Even outside the medium of expression
    that intend to hold dear to us.
    That is why I am out here "Sunnin people".
    Not because of their skin complexion.
    If I am referred to as delusional
    for knowing all of this I've elaborated on...

    Then my chin will be up.
    Because I know what I'm looking at.
    That vision isn't the "At Eternity's Gate" lenses that have the clear unfold of life
    up top, as a blur holds the bottom.

    "You're delusional if you believe
    that this can be marketed into a book.
    There's a better way to say all of that."

    That there was delivered to me
    more harshly than this title.
    So I can't truly be mad about this.
    But for Fuck's sake;
    I did point the gun into the abyss.
    You can hate us forever.
    Call us whatever you like,
    while you exist in the current
    for your breath to be taken away.
    As water still seeks it's own level-

    I'm so distinct.
    I've given an explanation of my own self
    Even when I didn't have to; for any stranger to see, since I speak my truth wherever I step foot. And we both know that won't stop whether you find it useless or not.

    Feel free to continue
    this insignificant campaign
    As you search for a magnifying glass
    to hammer me to pieces another day

    No hodge podge •
    Nothing personal •

    ~ 1UP

    | Posted on 2020-09-01 00:00:00 | by Rex Gold | [ Reply to This ]

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