breaking points and getting bent -------------------------------------------
in my head i hear you talking
and i don't know what to do
i know that it's not real
or at least i try to assume
i try to bow for respect
i did not mean to move my eyes
we're different pages of the same story
so we don't have to pick a side
what if we knew that the truth requires compromise
if we move through the pages together we'll all feel less victimized
everything doesn't add up the same
but i'm not counting on getting short changed
the whole scene could just up and rearrange
i'll still be shelving the gatorade
i don't want the glamor of a career
i'm just looking for a tool to help me care
and i don't mean it with a sneer
when i say to hell with likes and shares
i want to dance in the shadows
to know mysekf when the lights come on
my sickness isn't an anthem
i can't think myself better or wish myself strong
all i can do is choose my goals carefully
carving out my way through what the world has planned for me
i am not full or free of sentiment
close to my retirement
i'm just working for the time well spent
instead of years that i fear i'll regret
i don't care for hypotheticals
i can't do everything i'm told
i don't believe i'm truly cynical
but time and i grow old
i am flesh and blood
strung out on my own philosophy
about a bent society
and living with a disability
part of me really wants to take the easy ride
blame my sickness for my habits like the ghosts that haunt my mind
it would be easy, believe me
i've seen it before
i could think of new sypmtoms
when i'm manic or bored
but then i'll be left with the song in my head
about walking with gods while humanaties dead
i'd rather fall face first
and get a taste of the dirt
than let myself waste away
afraid to fail or to hurt
i probably won't take all your advice
but i'll listen when you have it
and i don't do it out of spite
when i choose to do the opposite
i'm a punk by accident
poetry is the consequence
whatever you see in me is who i am
twice the size and half the man
there's a train wreck in my thoughts
so my mood will probably diminish
i will try my best to keep routine
break downs come with consequence
Submission Name: breaking points and getting bent
