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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Epitaphdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: solitary_cross
    ASL Info:    19/female/Philippines
    Elite Ratio:    3.4 - 92/107/24
    Words: 107
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 707
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 799



    Description:
       Actually, the idea of this poem came from one of my thoughts about death. What if I died and no one ever visited my tombstone? That is the question that kept on lingering in my mind that it became stuck there until I started writing about it. I'm just a newbie here so have mercy a little! ^_^


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsEpitaphdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Staring at the constant hands
    Of this fragile face
    A mournful wind swept
    The inescapable remains

    Reminder of the past
    Brought by the hurling waves
    Etching out a sign
    That warm hands once made

    Bare fingers moved through
    The unwanted slopes of sand
    Tracing a fateful imprint
    So familiar, yet so vague

    The distant carmine sphere
    Evincing its mortality
    Fell into the clutches
    Of the celestial eve

    Curtains of truth
    Slowly closed themselves
    Incarcerating memories
    Of sorrow and regret

    Drifting back to the oblivion
    I glanced at the ring of time
    Never again to turn
    Against the flow of existence




    Submitted on 2004-08-15 06:59:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I love the movement of this. 'hurling waves', "bare fingers move through the sand", "a mournful wind swept" jsut tomention a few. I felt I was moving with each line, that I was going somewhere.
    This a beautiful piece that was soulfully written. I am adding it as a favorite
    | Posted on 2005-09-11 00:00:00 | by Tarwen Nevle | [ Reply to This ]
      the lines in this didn't really connect. it seemed like a lot of the time you were just trying to make it sound pretty so you put in big words, but it didn't help to connect the ideas, which are seriously all over the place. i also really don't get these two lines:
    "Staring at the constant hands
    Of this fragile face"
    i mean, i didn't know faces have hands...and these are the first lines of the piece so it needs to start with something a bit stronger.
    ~anabel
    | Posted on 2004-08-15 00:00:00 | by purple dinosaur | [ Reply to This ]
      This wasn't what I expected from a poem called "Epitaph", but it was good. I love the image and texture of the stone you give the reader.

    -emo.
    | Posted on 2004-08-15 00:00:00 | by emo-tastic | [ Reply to This ]
      This was nifty It was different and it was written very well in my opinion. I love the whole "flow of time" thing. It gives these piece a nice airy feel to it.
    | Posted on 2004-08-15 00:00:00 | by Cai | [ Reply to This ]


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