i have to say that i loved the meaning behind it but i wishe that there had been more to it. and i think that you had a litlle beter discription of what you ment in the discription for the poem sorry if i seem mean i was just giving you how i felt. but i really do love the meaning behind it and the idea. lia
What you have here is classsy, touching, and all that good stuff- but as the others said, it leaves you empty. Like showing someone a really awesome meal, and not letting them eat. I like what you have- its a nice overall metaphor. Try to expand, maybe.
did you mean "as the end of my day" or "at the end of my day"? yeah, i definitely want more words to this... i love the idea behind it, but if you expand it more it would be beautiful, i'm sure. a good start, though.
Great Job! I love short poems. Its says everything in one stanza, no need for anything more. I loved the language, the words hit the right spot. Don't make it longer if you wish not to, is perfect just like it is, pay no attention to the other coments.
like the sun setting off in the distance straight into the ocean... the mirror. very well done, Amy. you are the queen of minimalism, and i absolutely adore it! this makes me feel good this evening, and i shall think of that sun setting into that fluid sea tonight as i lay my head down for some much-needed rest!
sometimes i wonder if any of these people who want more have any kind of imagination themselves... isn't that what poetry is supposed to do? stimulate our imagination? i always love your stuff because my mind can go anywhere it wants... you set a beautiful stage, and i can see it the way my mind sees it. don't let the "make it longer" folk get you down.
Very simple and true, I wish I had a person I could write such thing or tell or... well, just having thoughts again. But water may be dangerous, don't you think? Oh but it's true, love is so refreshing...