Stitches and First Kisses -------------------------------------------
Bandages will break
Blood will bleed through
Unconvinced and unwilling the living die to be with you
Hearts will fall
Time will surely fade
Distracted and attracted the dead will live to see this day
And me, I’ll be second best
I’ll stay with you on Sundays till there’s not a Sunday left
And I’ll die, better than no one else
You say that I’m a hero but I can’t even save myself
From you
From you
From you
I can't even save myself From you
Answers they’ll receive
For questions that they ask
Timid and abrasive you’ve got knives for their backs
Tears will fall
Trust will surely fade
But I’ll be at your front door to greet you everyday
With a smile
And dreams of better things
Hopeless and aggressive cuz you don’t even know my name
But me, I’ll be second best
I’ll stay with you on Sundays till there’s not a Sunday left
And I’ll die, better than no one else
You say that I’m a hero but I can’t even save myself
From you, you’re such a sweet surprise
Like warm winter days and those cold summer nights
I’ll try, to be better than the rest
But you’ll smile for a while and I’ll always be second best
To you
To you
I'll always be second best
i can't even put into words how much i enjoyed this piece. my only complaint was the use of "cuz." i think it just takes away from such a beautiful piece of work.
But me, I’ll be second best I’ll stay with you on Sundays till there’s not a Sunday left And I’ll die, better than no one else You say that I’m a hero but I can’t even save myself From you, you’re such a sweet surprise Like warm winter days and those cold summer nights I’ll try, to be better than the rest But you’ll smile for a while and I’ll always be second best To you To you I'll always be second best
thats my fav stanza..u made me think of a war basically n which ur in the middle of n ur bein hit from both sides.. hers n urs.. it was well written..def addn to my favs
Hey there darlin. Well, this is impressive. I'm very picky when it comes to lyrics. As far as poetry itself goes, I'm a little more lenient. But since I myself am a composer and songwriter, lyrics are much more intricate in my mind.
This hit me like a ton of bricks. I loved how you wrote it. The rhyme was great. It wasn't so obvious that it became cliché. I especially like the first verse and the following line.
"Unconvinced and unwilling the living die to be with you"
That was very clever. Great writing my dear. I'd love to see more. Much love.
Oh, the tragedy of love lost... "Better to have loved and lost..." sometimes, I wonder... Broken-hearted lyrics fill my soul, but never could I so eloquently express them as you have... "I’ll stay with you on Sundays till there’s not a Sunday left, but I'll always be second best..." heh... better go before I start to cry... Virgil
oh my good lord...holy...wowsers. ok no that i'm gushing all over...you married? hehe sorry, this was awsome...the flow, clearity, imagery...yep true blue sky here that i'm floating in...dancing like a buttfly dodging your bullets...cool very very well done
Is this a song? The repeated stuff makes it complete. I don't know if this is just me, but I hear a definite melody coming from the words-like there's supposed to be music to it, it just hasn't been written yet. Thanks for commenting on my stuff-yours is great, from what I've read thus far. Yours, Archadya
I can relate. that was beautiful. i love that line "warm winter days and cold summer nights" as if everything is completely backwards. or the last to lines of the second stanza. it's a heartbreaker, i love it.
Sounded like a song to me. It's pretty cool. But why marr love with blood and ...murder? I guess that's just your style. Well, I'll keep an eye out for more of your stuff. Read ya later!
wow...is all i can murmur. dear, where have you been? you're quite an exceptional writer...i think this is intensified shout-in-your-face-with-only-expressions poetry...the kind where these are the things you think of and won't ever say, because it either hurts too much or there's somethin holding you back or there just is no way or need to utter it in lingual torture...lets face it, thats what us poets are here for, right? torture of the norm. lines that are absolutely brilliant: ...But me, I’ll be second best I’ll stay with you on Sundays till there’s not a Sunday left And I’ll die, better than no one else You say that I’m a hero but I can’t even save myself... and ...But I’ll be at your front door to greet you everyday With a smile And dreams of better things Hopeless and aggressive cuz you don’t even know my name... that last bit, god...! grrr, its almost like you read my mind on how i feel about certain people...its like edgy and desperate or somethin. i dunno...sorry, my commentary get reallllly long sometimes. but only when i get into somethin...get used to it, i think...i'll be definitely back to your page. what else can i say, this is gorgeous art. love and daisies~april
wow... i really like how for your chorus like bit (not saying that songs need choruses but youve repeated a sequence over...) that you extended it the second time... added more to it, to her, to why you'll be second best... and i wonder, when you say your gonna be better than all the rest, whether its better or worse to be the best seoncd best... but yeah... thats just my thinking...i really love your style
again you've written something that is all heart and honesty and pure emotion.
there are so many interesting and beautifully written lines.. the chorus is excellent.. i love the line "i'll die better than no one else.." there is something very desperate about it.. the lengths that you're willing to go to for her..
what i've seen of your writing.. you seem to to put everything of yourself in the words. you dont hold anything back. and i think that is one of the signs of a true writer.
Wow. I really enjoyed this. I haven't read any of your other works but I will definately have to check your page out after reading such a powerful piece. I love the part about being a hero but you can't even save myself. Excellent. -blt
omg ... im lost for words. this is beautiful. i love it ... wow.. excelent. ur talented man. and it shows alot. i really really like this alot. and i will keep reading ur work.
Submission Name: Stitches and First Kisses
Virgil 
