Description: Have you ever felt like going, not in any particular direction, for no particular reason, just for the sake of moving?
Drive To Where? -------------------------------------------
Passing by empty warehouses
On one side, dancing lightning
On the other – mice cower
So tiny under the stroboscopic blossom
Of the skies
And this is beauty to some
Pale or desolate, it says so much more
Than a pair of eyes
The darkness riding all along with us or
Thickening under the skies
Sliding against us on our way
It almost speaks, it almost says
That even though we’ve been everywhere
We might not be going anywhere
Crawling aimlessly, flying by
Swarming like flies around light...
Yet again, I'm fooled by not reading the description first. I read the poem and thought "wow, well written but, like Seinfeld, it's about nothing... if only you got to the 'where' part". Then I read the description. Excellently written. I understood what you were driving it, even if I didn't know that I did. :)
The only thing I didn't like was the reference to our wandering nomadlike as "swarming". Just seemed counterintuitive. Just me.
it feels like going nowhere. not sure why, it felt that way when l read your poem... it is very interesting, cause the read seems as tho' it could go, in many directions.
punch the kid in the ribs I said, He is a bsatard.. The headmaster is watching.. It made me laugh, because i'm weird I liked it, it could use a little work, but it's nothing to big.
Submission Name: Drive To Where?
