Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: La Jolladots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 69
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 910
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 460



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLa Jolladots
    -------------------------------------------


    I left you in La Jolla;
    I had this sinking feeling.
    and you drug me deeper still.
    I couldn't cry away my sadness:
    Couldn't fight away my anger...
    I feel like a child for running away:
    I feel like a saint for leaving you unscathed.
    Maybe that waitress (that couldn't wait)
    saved you from the captive hell
    we made together,
    but we called it making love.






    Submitted on 2004-02-22 04:04:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Ooooh, now this I like. It's incredible, and that last line... "But we called it making love." so sudden and complete a reversal. Beautiful. Sad, very sad, but very well crafted. <><
    | Posted on 2004-03-22 00:00:00 | by WorththeWait | [ Reply to This ]
      Winner.
    Spot on and the use of 'drug me deeper' conveys emotions nearing the lowest ebb but you seem to have got down there almost without knowing...
    Tell us how you felt a week later...
    Hasta,
    K
    | Posted on 2004-02-22 00:00:00 | by Awkward | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    2256

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Giving written by jjd
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    To written by SavedDragon
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Push written by JanePlane
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Bond written by saartha

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry