pondering by natasha

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Submission Name: pondering dots

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Author:	natasha
ASL Info:	15/f/brampton
Elite Ratio:	2.55 - 113/159/52
Words:	147

Class/Type:	Poetry/Passion
Total Views:	286
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	1034

Description:
my best friend wanted me to make a poem called pondering and this came to mind. im not sure why its calledpondering. but it has to do with my ex. so i made this. and its true. i did cut my self once and will never do it agian. giveing ur self pain isnt worth someones love

pondering dots

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with the words in my head, thoughts on paper i cant even imagine how your feeling.do u even know how i feel? that is un thinkable..
words
lies.
truth
cries.
the innocence's
of a little gurl
lost in this big world.

shes alone but happy where she stands.
sits
smiles
laughs
joys.
moments of love...

the thought of him is in her mind thinkng of there time they had..
love,
sweet,
happy
everything..

then times got bad.
he was mad,
made her cry.
she cut her self
wanting to die.

he came back
she had a scar.
of the love that
went wrong..

pondering..
thoughts on paper.
that are in her mind..
she reads back and starts to cry.
loving
hateing,
crying writeing.
sweet
innocent.
scars will heal but her love will never die.

Submitted on 2004-09-01 10:56:15 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
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||| Comments |||
  The poem is great, the emotion is very deep, even if it looks simple, somehow sounds great. It's sad too and I'm glad that at the end the girl was alright. Keep writing, this is great. The title kinda doesn't go with it (maybe that's just me). Anyways, I liked it very much. Keep it up and I hope you never go through that again.
| Posted on 2004-09-01 00:00:00 | by April0414 | [ Reply to This ]
  I really liked this, the flow was great the emotional content outstanding, ahh but the spelling writeing=writing, there=thier, but very nicely done, you have grasped your emotions well...Bob:)
| Posted on 2004-09-01 00:00:00 | by poetryman | [ Reply to This ]
  Oh my god.., omg, okay, ok,,, sorry.., l am thinking. Thinking of your discription about this poem, and the title and also, the body of the poem. lt indicate passon, and l don't want to place all the pieces together. The writing is very well done! Most Indeed
| Posted on 2004-09-01 00:00:00 | by Vibrant | [ Reply to This ]
  i think u expressed ur feelings very well. although there are typing mistakes. the first couple lines are too long and dnt really go with the poem. but i did like it...it reminds me of something in my life! i do agree with ur comment...people should not cut themselves for someone's love!
-Ashleigh
| Posted on 2004-09-01 00:00:00 | by unfixable | [ Reply to This ]
  so much emotion. i don't really no what to say.. i don't want to say i enjoyed it.. its seems too personnal, too raw.. i don't know. (i did like it by the way) you expressed your feelings so well here...
| Posted on 2004-09-01 00:00:00 | by wilderness | [ Reply to This ]
  i think that what you are doing is a great thing to show what you have been through and what you have learned from it. it can someday help someone else that might be goign through the same things. i think its great how you made the connection with the dicription to the stile of the poem. very discriptive about the situation and its really good for the reader because i could live your experience without having to go through it. i feel for you, but i stand in reverance because i know you have gone through a hard situation and have overcome. there will be other guys and there will be other love! there will be happier times as well as more loss. but what ever happens know that you have had the courage to get this far and you should see it through till the end! TOTALLY apreciative of your writting, me
| Posted on 2004-09-01 00:00:00 | by ibelikeso | [ Reply to This ]
  natasha,you are once again baring your feelings for all to see.that could be a good thing but it could also lead to some backlash from those who view the subject matter of your poems as being all too similar.personally,i think that you might be once again in agony over an old relationship that you might do better with by just forgetting about it if you can.despite the typos,you have done a good job.good luck and fare well.
| Posted on 2004-09-01 00:00:00 | by sickly | [ Reply to This ]

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