Tiptoeing Around Landmines by mixedemotions00

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Submission Name: Tiptoeing Around Landmines dots

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Author:	mixedemotions00
ASL Info:	21/F/US
Elite Ratio:	6.34 - 561/361/63
Words:	72

Class/Type:	Poetry/Angst
Total Views:	350
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	598

Description:
You all know these feelings.

Not really liking the break-out thing... it's about acne, and that's pretty superficial. But it is true that my physical state deteriorates when the emotional state at home is poor. And my hair really was falling out for about 2 weeks when the tension was at it's worst.

Tiptoeing Around Landmines dots

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Strained,
stressed,
all lifelines pulled taut.
At the end of this rope,
the edge of this cliff
built by
weeks and months
of tension and bickering.

Another handful of hair
pulled out
and tossed in the garbage.
Another breakout
caused by
these warning looks,
these carefully-worded accusations,
these intricate dance moves.

The art of
tiptoeing around landmines
has nearly been perfected
in this structure
we bitterly call
Home.

Submitted on 2004-09-02 00:56:37 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  Yes, the topic does have a familiar ring to it. I used to think that living with a woman was like living in a minefield, long bits of wire sticking out to get you, leading back to sins of omission and sins of commission, emotional triggers that can torpedo your best resolves not to annoy each other. We are cocked and primed and ready to go off, and whatever triggers the landmine, be it tank, be it an infantryman or be it a rabbit, the explosion is always the same - a million megatonnes of stored invective and diatribe. Wow, your poem must be good, because even the title has got me emoting and thinking and I haven't even critiqued the rest of the poem yet. Yes, I like the way you supply the imagery and allow us to supply the inferential reality behind it. I can see that wandering around ina poetic landscape like yours, you would need to wear an emotional flak jacket. A concise poem, an elegant poem, a very accessible poem, a mature poem. well done.
| Posted on 2005-01-08 00:00:00 | by hanuman | [ Reply to This ]
  wow...sounds like life at my place...well here and there.

so very true, the human body can only take so much of any emotion without producing different chemicals reacting in ways we can't control...
awsome reflection of 'STRESS'...at the brink
| Posted on 2004-10-06 00:00:00 | by clay | [ Reply to This ]
  wow... i used to have a home like that and yeah... tiptoeing round landmines is an artform ive decided... but yeah... this is a very real write and i admire your honesty and maybe even bravery to share it. i was stunned by the image of the cliff having been a creation of weeks/months of tension... ive never seen it put like that before and it really is how it is... i hope stuff gets better for you...
| Posted on 2004-09-02 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
  very fantastic. at first i thought u meant landmines as in a battle field but relating it to home life is great. it makes me feel as if im home past curfew or im sneaking out of the house.
| Posted on 2004-09-02 00:00:00 | by Napastak | [ Reply to This ]
  expressing such anguish is a blessing for us because we create such beautiful emotional pieces. and i applaud yours. it's an understandment not to be able to feel your words as it has been written with frustration of what is going on in the world around us and even in our own surroundings thus reflecting/stressing our bodies to react. It's part of growing up and surviving life.

your piece is well-met~

~mawwy~
| Posted on 2004-09-02 00:00:00 | by mawwy | [ Reply to This ]
  Ow... this actually hurts. It comes across as really highly-strung and fraught, which is exactly what it's goal seemed to be.

And when things are bad enough, one more spot to the world is a whole new volcano to you. A handful becomes a barrowful... things just blow out of proportion, and they might seem silly to people but they matter to you.

My hair falls out something rotten when I'm stressed :/ And right now I've got lovely clear skin... except for a HUGE zit on my chin. And it just doesn't help to think that my body is conspiring against me too.
So I like that you chose to portray angst and stress in this way. It's as reealistic as it gets but you don't seem to feel the need to explain your family's entire transgression list, just its effect.
Does me just fine.
Good write :)
| Posted on 2004-11-26 00:00:00 | by Learah | [ Reply to This ]

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