Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Paradoxdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: bentnotbroken
    ASL Info:    25+/m/middle of nowhere
    Elite Ratio:    4.6 - 351/260/38
    Words: 33
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1045
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 288



    Description:
       Once again, something written a while back that really needs work. I'm not sure exactly what I'm looking for in response to this, so anything would be great.
    J


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsParadoxdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Love--eternity's greatest paradox:
    agony and extascy,
    pleasure and pain.
    Conquering lovers
    are in turn conquered--
    blending heroic exploits
    and unfathomable fear.
    We need and want love
    but are terrified when confronted with it.




    Submitted on 2004-09-09 15:48:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Love is the perfect parodox. Like you said. Pain and happiness, both are instrumental in love. It is sad but it is true and I love how you point this out. Life is quirky eh??

    But yes this was a great piece,

    Peace Love and Buttercups
    Jaz
    | Posted on 2006-04-13 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      theres not much i can say about this poem except that its very true. like, very very true. its depressing how contrasting love can be. i can't even begin to tell you how true this is. im barely even reading the poem, just seeing the truth. sorry bout that. amazing job on this one. and its so (youll never guess) true.
    | Posted on 2004-11-29 00:00:00 | by jonsmithy | [ Reply to This ]
      this is kinda defeatest... kinda giving up hope in love... making it out of reach... but fair enough... it brings out the best and the worst in ppl which can be seen in this poem... love is just one big paradox... did you know that love and hate are the same chemical imbalance of the brain...? wouldnt really surprise me if there was any truth in that statement really but yeah... anyways... needless to say i really like this poem... especially the part about conquering lovers conquered (and i know i cant spell...) i reals like your groove! cheers!
    | Posted on 2004-10-08 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      I would make just a few minor changes.
    Love
    Eternity's greatest paradox of
    agony and extascy,
    pleasure and pain.
    Conquering lovers
    Are in turn conquered-
    Blending heroic exploits
    and unfathomable fear.
    We need and crave love
    but are terrified when confronted with it.

    You may use or discard any of these suggested changes, but it was quicker to change the few words than try to explain it.
    jan
    | Posted on 2004-09-09 00:00:00 | by jaycee | [ Reply to This ]
      This is great. You are very right. I have never thought of love that way, but it's true. It is wonderful how you shed a new light on the subject of love. Quoting parts of someones piece usually bothers me, but the last line spoke to me. It really opened my eyes to the poem in understanding it better. Such emotions together in one poem, awesome. Well done.
    | Posted on 2004-09-09 00:00:00 | by Poechick13 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    23695

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Hyle written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry