Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Kick Medots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 56
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 731
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 412



    Description:
       This is older, and I know it's not great, but I feel dreadful, so it doesn't matter.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsKick Medots
    -------------------------------------------


    You're like that mean boy
    who knocked down bird's nests and spider webs
    just to make me cry,
    but overripe, bruised peaches
    seem tough compared to me,
    scarred by gentle rain,
    burned by my own tears,
    while those more inadequate go unnoticed.
    Perhaps I have "kick me" tattooed somewhere
    invisible only to me.






    Submitted on 2004-09-11 03:42:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is very sad. Hmm... the idea of:

    "Perhaps I have "kick me" tattooed somewhere
    Invisible only to me"

    is original and really does the thing. I think I know how it is, so I can relate. Again with just few words you get the point. Well, even if there is a 'kick me' on our back... just don't care about it. Only malicious people use such 'opportunity' to make them feel 'better'.
    | Posted on 2004-09-14 00:00:00 | by Nightraven | [ Reply to This ]
      This is an interesting thought. If this were true, I think I've got lots of such instructions pinned on me like Ignore Me, Trample On My Feelings, Make Fun of Me... I bet they've covered up all the instructions I was born with like Love Me, Listen to Me, Understand Me...
    Nice write Cuddle.
    | Posted on 2004-09-12 00:00:00 | by Judy | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh!
    This poem will make me cry and pray for you... your lines touchs every heart... Well done my dear lady... hope you will go on writing great things.
    Khaled Abdallah.
    | Posted on 2004-09-12 00:00:00 | by Khaled AbdAllah | [ Reply to This ]
      this makes me so sad because i know how sensitive you are, just like me. the line "scarred by gentle rain/Burned by my own tears..." just makes me want to wrap you up into a warm and safe cocoon... this is a good poem, despite what you may say. very open and honest... and sad... *hugs* to you.
    | Posted on 2004-09-11 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      I really thought this was great. Everyone can relate to feeling weak compared to bruised peaches. (Excellent comparison.) I always enjoy your writings. Even this type, about being down. You make it seem not so down. That's the difference between a lot of other writes about being depressed or down, you make it seem bearable. Great job.
    -blt
    | Posted on 2004-09-11 00:00:00 | by borderlinetears | [ Reply to This ]
      well now I can't kick a woman cuz of the gentleman in me. You need to stop and smell the flowers. That's what I always tell people who are so wrapped up with their daily lives. Also need to spend time alone by themselves. you would be suprised at how refresh you feel after doing this.that's what i get from this poem. heh if ya still need a kick, i'll just give ya a full body message.
    | Posted on 2004-09-11 00:00:00 | by hotrodruss | [ Reply to This ]
      why so down?? you don't need to feel this way. you don't have "kick me" tattooed on you. I like your description of the mean boy, the line 'Who knocked down bird's nests and spider webs' is great. it's a good poem.
    | Posted on 2004-09-11 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like this piece. It is very descriptive and gets the feeling across clearly. My fav part is: "While those more inadequate go unnoticed"... it's a very profound sentence and says more than you realise at first glance.
    | Posted on 2004-09-11 00:00:00 | by Beulah | [ Reply to This ]
      you really dont need to think that way. this poem was good, i liked the comparison between peaches and you.

    the scarred by rain and burned by my tears was also good. but reealy i dont think you have a kick me tattoo anywhere cause i cant see it.

    Zu
    | Posted on 2004-09-11 00:00:00 | by Zu | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    23865

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The World written by jjd
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry