Tears on Parchment
|
|
Description:
A poem about lost love, rejection, and all such sad things in life that trouble a person- this time written from the point of the poet.
Tears on Parchment
Trembling, my heart is lonely Stung by autumn's chill Desperate words poured out on paper Cannot, this void, fufill My clouded eyes seek beauty, Reflected on a crisp, cream page Dreams scrawled in ink are meaningless, Except from an artful sage These longings burn within me deep Though I struggle to express A verse that maybe you would keep In the place of my caress And 'lo, the words I wrote to you Beneath the starlit skies: "When you said you loved me, With laughter in your eyes When you fell into my arms, Alone on the riverside When all around us seemed to fade, Lost from the moonlight's cries When this moment I would never trade, For all the riches of the earth When you denied your love that sunless day, My heart saw you turn in mirth..." I can't go on, my thoughts are few, Tears drown what words I write Why have you gone? Oh, why, my love... I can see no end in sight You'll never see these phrases, Yet I write them all the same You filled my heart with utter joy And now leave me in pure shame If a poem could alone evoke All I wish that you could feel My love, my pain, a cold night's chill The warmth of days when love was real My shallow breath trembles as I read What words of love and prose confide My solitary soul sinks back again To where these tears on parchment hide |
Submitted on 2004-09-12 15:03:47 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post
Comments
| Dang. This poem has so many lines in it I ...love. "These longings burn within me deep Though I struggle to express A verse that maybe you would keep In the place of my caress" These would probably have to be my favorite. They are *groovy*. I've read them at least...100 times. Had the same effect on me as a breathtaking view, and I'm still trying to get over the sweaty palms and racing heart. The love was coated with a layer of depressing sadness that only being parted from someone you truly care about can cause. Splendid. | Posted on 2005-01-16 00:00:00 | by LucyDiamond | [ Reply to This ] | Wow, excellent poem. I've never seen such a lost put into a place as well as this one was. I'm sorry to hear you had to go through this. | "You'll never see these phrases, Yet I write them all the same You filled my heart with utter joy And now leave me in pure shame" Excellent stanza, escept for the last line. Perhaps taking off the pure would put a better flow on your piece. To be hones I noticed you were one or two syllables in a couple stanzas/lines. One of the greatest peices of advice I ever recieved was counting my syllables, and believe me it improved my writing so much. Although everynow and then, like on my latest piece, I mess my flow up horribly. Oh well. Excellent piece, matter o' fact, a favorite. --Kayla | Posted on 2004-12-10 00:00:00 | by Superman | [ Reply to This ] | No seriuosly...i really am eating apple pie...again. lol. OK, anyways... back to what really matters! | Ari, your brilliance AMAZES me! I especially liked the 2nd and 3rd stanzas. Oh and the phrases "When you fell into my arms, Alone on the riverside When all around us seemed to fade, Lost from the moonlight's cries When this moment I would never trade, For all the riches of the earth" It so totally reminds me of things that are quite pleasant. Overall, this is a BEAUTIFUL piece... thought kind of sad because of the dying love. Nonetheless... I agree with Suven and clay... HOW DARE YOU THINK OF IT FIRST! lol. Ari, you deserve a gold star!  | Posted on 2004-09-13 00:00:00 | by Kali | [ Reply to This ] | I agree Suven..stolden...stolden...lol... | Wish I did write it...cause holy hanna I feel it. Awesome job...I loved 'when you fell into my arms alone on the riverside' made me cold...such a warth there at that part...but maybe undertone of whats to come...or the longing to hold forever... well done, thanks so much for sharing ~clay~ | Posted on 2004-09-12 00:00:00 | by clay | [ Reply to This ] | These longings burn within me deep | Though I struggle to express A verse that maybe you would keep In the place of my caress first off, i didn't mind the length at all. Everything expressed was written well and felt right. The stanza above is making me blink way more than natural- and i resent you for that. If a poem could alone evoke All I wish that you could feel and this, breaks the control, and i could throw myself away with the words. I've tried so hard to do just that... last stanza is darling, last verse i would kill to have thought of first! You're so evil Ari...how could you do this to a fellow writer? Overall, the essence, I think you stole from me and all dying romantics struck cold of this world.  | Posted on 2004-09-12 00:00:00 | by Suven7 | [ Reply to This ] | oh...wow...you seem to write with years that you have not yet known...you're so young...this poem was beautiful...Seemingly so tragic...it just sorta flowed while i read it... | Cannot, this void, fufill really like that line. To me, it portrays such desperation, such longing...this piece...beyond the definition which I can provide...i havent the words to express...its a fave:) ->Dark | Posted on 2004-10-31 00:00:00 | by drk_angl_17 | [ Reply to This ] | Ari, I can never tell you enough how great you are. This is my first work I've read of yours. Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. I had tears, literally. You tend to always have a focal point that you wish to express in every stanza, every line. I love it. You're so deep and expressive. Haha...suggestions? I'd like for you to give ME suggestions...I've always been known to write decently, but certainly not to your calibur. Awesome. | | Posted on 2004-12-06 00:00:00 | by wanderingpoet16 | [ Reply to This ] | |
24030