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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Words of Othello (excerpt)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Dandan
    ASL Info:    19/F/Florida
    Elite Ratio:    4.93 - 604/323/49
    Words: 569
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 418
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 3282



    Description:
       Okay, so you guys won't read my Othello screenplay because it's too long -- but you have no excuse now. I've decided to conform to your needs and include just the poetic part (which happen to be all of Othello's lines). I wrote this as part of an assignment in English last year and was quite pleased with it. Let me know your thoughts on it, and if you care for it, continue on to my other submission called "Othello" for the full script. Thanks for taking the time...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Words of Othello (excerpt)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Oh, host Madame,
    What dare I do?
    This memory haunts me
    Through and through.
    My friend 'twas once
    this evil foe
    who caused me such
    nightmarish woe.
    ...'Tis some somber tale I tell
    which still withholds me from the spell
    ... Still unanswered by my own
    Knowledge, would thee... spirits...loan?

    Oh, please, my hot tem'per forgive
    'tis with a heavy heart I live
    like man I feel not - a dog am I
    (lacking parts) I long to die
    Already once, my life I took
    with no back-thought or second look
    my wife I killed - unjustly so
    and all for thought she was a ho.
    Iago moved my hand toward wrong
    and scared away the happy song
    that filled my life of joy and glee
    and drove the sanity from me.
    Oh, green eyed monster that me betook,
    undo me from thy wretched hook
    of jealous thought and plagu'ed mind;
    me, from trapping snare, unbind!
    I plead thee, spirits
    come, be known;
    let thy blessed acts be shown
    for marvelous words untold
    thy witty knowledge does behold.

    Unfortunately I say nay
    Iago's evil had its way
    I ne'er asked my wife of this
    and ne'er, her, saw Cassio kiss.
    My handkerchief did she lose
    and I in igno'rance did choose
    that this was fault enough to take
    a fatal step for mankind's sake.
    If I'd but known
    deceit was told
    I should have, penalty, withhold
    But, he was honest
    and I - a fool-
    who loved not wisely,
    but let love rule.
    And so she, lying in my arms,
    and dead - pathetic- by my harms...
    she struggled not and knew much less
    for my feelings, I did not confess.
    My heart did burn so full of flame
    and knew not more than who to blame
    at prodding it, in rage, released
    the actions the did breathing cease.

    The token lost and dev'lish word
    with scene contrived and things not heard
    Iago's ear hath heard it all
    and yet it's he who pushed me fall.
    'Tis part my fault - I do agree
    But still, there is some mystery
    That only by his silenced tongue
    Can this forsaken truth be wrung....

    'Tis shame, this lady speaks for sooth
    and this is nothing but the truth
    I begged of her to share her thought
    and yet her husband's words I sought
    to be the answer to my quest
    to see my wife had nonetheless
    been - contrary - to her own
    and seeds of wickedness had sown
    by making love and passion rise
    betwixt our sheets
    with moans and sighs
    I wanted not and yet I did
    my jealous thoughts were ne'er hid
    and with a bad ending did come
    the smoth'ring of a loved one.

    And to thee all, I bid farewell
    and hope this tale, your life, won't tell
    For it merely in Othello will
    leave you not depressed.




    Submitted on 2004-09-12 20:14:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      True Iambic pent, is awfully hard to actually do. You're very close, and with the assumed ancient dialect I find the work intruiging. I'd agree with the first post on the self censorship however. I'd like to see the profanity just as a matter honesty. Great work...
    | Posted on 2004-10-15 00:00:00 | by harley3k | [ Reply to This ]
      Obsessed with Othello?but i loved it.beautiful and haunting.The regret is pathetic and i would love it if u could perhaps do something like this to the other shakespearan tragic heroes.great write.
    | Posted on 2004-09-14 00:00:00 | by whyme | [ Reply to This ]
      Hehe... I love this. I don't know why... but this made me smile. Yes, I realize that Othello isn't the happiest Shakespear play out there. And yes, I did read your long Othello screenplay! I just did it late at night with no time to comment. I'm a dork... Anyway, I absolutley loved the structure you used here and even though I have no ide what Iambic Pentamer is (does that make me stupid and ignorant... oh well) as said before, it worked very well here. I can't thing of anything really specific to say so I'll just say kudos my friend. Awesome job, keep it up!

    (and yes... even though this was really good... you're still a bum...)

    | Posted on 2004-09-14 00:00:00 | by ACircuitShock | [ Reply to This ]
      I am curious, were you trying to write this in Iambic pentameter, because some of it is and other parts are close, and while other parts are just way off. The content is good, but I really didn't think that two of the lines fit, one being and all for thought she was a BLEEP![ho], maybe you should just write whore and leave out the bleep. The other line is the last, but the only reason I didn't think it fit because it doesn't rhyme. The only other thing that I would say is don't use a word to make something rhyme if it is going to sound forced, you did it a few times. All in all it is a good work but with a little more work it could be really good.
    | Posted on 2004-09-12 00:00:00 | by Matthew Grey | [ Reply to This ]



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