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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Girlfrienddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: nameless_nobody
    ASL Info:    18 in a few days.
    Elite Ratio:    4.38 - 333/421/67
    Words: 205
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 1367
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1294



    Description:
       more punk rock inspired stuff so imagine blink 182 singing it. tell me what ya think and if you got any ideas for the last line of the chorus i would be very greatfull. also the 'suck my cock' line sucks so advice there is also much apreciated. and any other sugestions or constructive critacism is welcome. just be honest. whats good whats bad and what could be better.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsGirlfrienddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Do ya wana be my girlfriend,
    We'll walk 'round hand in hand,
    You can come to all my gigs,
    Watch me playing with my band.

    Do you wana be my girlfriend,
    We can make out by my pool,
    Do you wana get with me,
    'n be the most envied girl in school.

    She said no.
    Said i am a jerk,
    Said she hate rockers,
    Said she loves a nerd.
    Said i am to shallow,
    Said i wouldnt love her,
    Said shes better than me,
    Said shes more than i deserve.

    Do you wana be my girlfriend,
    I'll buy you pretty things,
    I'll get you backstage passes,
    So you can listen to me sing.

    Do you wana be my girlfriend,
    You can come'n see me rock,
    You can see me cetting wasted,
    you can suck my cock.

    She said no.
    Said i am a jerk,
    Said she hate rockers,
    Said she loves a nerd.
    Said i am to shallow,
    Said i wouldnt love her,
    Said shes better than me,
    Said shes more than i deserve.

    (-~- music stops -~-)

    She said no.
    Said i am a jerk,
    Said she hate rockers,
    Said she loves a nerd.






    Submitted on 2004-09-23 13:56:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      hey i liked this .it was funny and full of the truth .but why do people want the ones they cant get.im not a guy but if she thought i was to good for her,i would think shes boring and dont deserve to suck my cock,,,lol
    | Posted on 2004-11-26 00:00:00 | by wildheart | [ Reply to This ]
      oops i meant not good enough for her. ok going to check out some of your other stuff .weird al could sure have fun with this
    | Posted on 2004-11-26 00:00:00 | by wildheart | [ Reply to This ]
      k this is a weird song... never read anything like it... its okay but i just didnt feel much from it. maybe its the fact that i only got 4 hours of sleep and i cant go back to bed.. anyways... this is okay... it kinda gives a message that hot rockstars can't get all the girls... doesnt matter what they can give... i like that i guess... you might want to re-read this, i see some writing errors, looks more like typos but yea... have a nice day
    | Posted on 2004-09-25 00:00:00 | by nameless child | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey, what girl wouldn't JUMP at the chance to suck on someone's cock! I always find that so funny, guys saying, "I'll let [censored] on my cock", like it's something they would NOT want you to do and they're being magnanimous LETTING you do it...

    Otherwise, I thought this was pretty good for a Blink 182-ish pop song...ya never know, put a catchy enough tune to it and you could get famous
    | Posted on 2004-09-23 00:00:00 | by Emerging Soul | [ Reply to This ]
      wierd how much i actually liked it, i totally imagined it put to some music. A little underdeveloped with the wording, but totally gets to the point, and i love the way you got there.
    | Posted on 2004-09-23 00:00:00 | by Josh | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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