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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The heart never liesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lost and alone
    ASL Info:    19/F/Sandiego,CA
    Elite Ratio:    3.4 - 159/140/58
    Words: 164
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 1554
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1037



    Description:
       I'm looking for advice and some emotional feedback, This morning my boyfriend got into an argument that turned into a three hour fight,(verbal) over something really stupid, and these are some of the thoughts going through my head as I look back we've been together since Nov. of '03'


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe heart never liesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Is it really worth the pain?
    To fall in love and leave your heart,
    Susceptable to such an ache?
    Leaving your concience to take, the fall.
    When you let someone shatter your heart.
    Into so many pieces, that you'v lost slivers of that heart.
    That once used to be whole.
    You thought your heart was strong,
    you thought you could sheild it ,
    from that kind of pain.
    Never thought, you'd let your guard down,
    Enough for anyone to see the real you.
    But one day you met a man,
    Who could melt the icycles, that guarded
    the block of ice,
    that was so coldly frozen to your heart,
    no one could chip it away.
    But he's melted the icycles,and broken the ice
    But your heart he's shattered too.
    There are so many pieces you don't know what to do.
    For the first time,
    you know what real pain feels like.
    Not only does it hurt it aches....


    heart




    Submitted on 2004-09-23 15:13:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      why do u refer to the heart as a block of ice but anyways if he is so bad why do u need him if u fight over stupid stuff then u can definitely do better
    | Posted on 2004-10-12 00:00:00 | by doom_gloomgirl | [ Reply to This ]
      Okay. Don't worry if you fight over stupid things. Eventually you'll realize that these things don't matter enough to fight over. If you are only fighting over little things than I'd say it's fairly healthy unless it gets volitle. Digression- Anyway about this piece. It starts of strong but you lose it a little ways through. Right here-Into so many pieces, that you'v lost slivers of that heart.
    That once used to be whole.
    You thought your heart was strong,
    you thought you could sheild it ,
    from that kind of pain.

    the break up seems sloppy and forced at this point. If it is just the way it ended up in this program, don't worry, but if this is the true break up than definately reconsider it to provide strength to the lines individual.
    peace
    | Posted on 2004-10-19 00:00:00 | by shaman | [ Reply to This ]
      i like your poem im not really sure what to put in comments to make them good just yet but thanx for the feedback you gave me and just advice or whatever if you and your bf are fighting over stupid stuff all the time things will probably work out but later you may regret wasteing the time you have together being mad at eachother -blacktearz
    | Posted on 2004-10-19 00:00:00 | by blacktearz | [ Reply to This ]
      To fall in love and leave your heart,
    Susceptable to such an ache?
    Leaving your concience to take, the fall.
    When you let someone shatter your heart.
    Into so many pieces, that you'v lost slivers of that heart.
    That once used to be whole.

    this to me stands out the most...or gets my attention the most...but hun, I have to say this...if you guys are always battling no matter how long the relationship...if you start to question your love or his intentions in most cases you need not to stay...from girl to girl that is what I have to say...take it to heart or ignore it completely that is totally up to you
    BRWN
    | Posted on 2004-09-23 00:00:00 | by Brwnsknsam05 | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this a lot. Relationships have their ups and downs and enormous risks. But you have to melt your cold heart and allow yourself to take that risk. I love it. Very nicely written as well.
    | Posted on 2004-09-23 00:00:00 | by Scribbles1338 | [ Reply to This ]
      He and I have had really good times lately though we have been disagreeing on a lot, I just started going back to school and he's afraid that I'm going to cheat on him, I told him that if I can trust him he needs to trust me... he's been in some really [censored]ty relationships. He's ten years older than I and he recently got devorched, because while he was in jail for a FTP his ex-wife not only cheated on him while in jail, but while she was on the phone to him she was [censored] around.
    | Posted on 2004-09-23 00:00:00 | by lost and alone | [ Reply to This ]


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