driving from a memory
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Description:
...No, this isn't about me directly, but I did cry when I wrote this...
driving from a memory
Driving down this empty road You’ve driven here with me And I can’t help but recollect All those times when we were free The headlights are growing dimmer As I come back to this road Watching the horizon Disappear into the dark I pull off on the shoulder And I set the car in park I really should not be driving Out at night with such a storm I just want you to be here Wishing you would keep me warm Just like you used to do But now you’ve gone away from me I’ve forgotten where I’m headed Can’t remember why I’m here As I sit here in the darkness Simply wishing you were near I can’t make myself continue Driving from a memory I check the rearview mirror And can’t see a single light The icy road’s now empty And my future’s not too bright I miss you more then ever Out here where we used to be We’d drive on this road together Back when you were here with me I can’t go on without you Now where am I to go As I sit here in my parked car All alone watching the snow Just like we used to do Before you went so far away I just want you to come back And kiss me like you used to do Promise not to say goodbye to me Because I’m lost without you And you always hated it when I cried Tell me that you love me Say those words just one more time I’ll be loving you forever I need to hear that you’re alright But I just cannot stop crying And I won’t give up the fight The tears just keep on coming And I know I cannot drive As I sit out here so lonely Wishing you were still alive |
Submitted on 2004-10-03 22:32:34 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments
Horribly and beautifully sad. The reader can visualize himself right there with you, whether he can relate or not. I agree with eener about stanzas making it a little bit easier to follow, although I like the idea of the thoughts rambling out one right after the other. That's how I think sometimes. And driving is one of my passions, so I can completely relate to the memories and the nostalgia. Bittersweet. You say it's not about you directly-you did a wonderful job of making it sound like it is. You can really put yourself in someone else's shoes.| | Posted on 2004-10-04 00:00:00 | by ber | [ Reply to This ] | Wow. I love poems that contain the most important piece of information in the very last line; it makes the piece so clear and vivid. | With this piece, I would break it up into stanzas, so that it would be much easier for the reader to follow. Your rhymes seem to be a bit messy, but creating stanzas and a little revision would clear that up. The flow would be excellant if the rhymes were easier to follow. Very nice piece...very sad. | Posted on 2004-10-03 00:00:00 | by eener | [ Reply to This ] | This is so sad. It's a very powerful write. Memories of a loved one, driving away from those memories. Trying to escape the reality that the person has passed on. I teared up with this one as well! I think you should add periods and commas to help it flow but that's it. It's really a good write, sad but good. :( Good job. | -blt | Posted on 2004-10-03 00:00:00 | by borderlinetears | [ Reply to This ] | |
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