Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

Author: Damien Vladimir
ASL Info:    28/m/hollywood/Ca
Elite Ratio:    3.84 - 122 /89 /35
Words: 70
Class/Type: Poetry /Friendship
Total Views: 1467
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 495


The writers page,
it's a site of true emotion
poetic slaves,
we display our true devotion
as others read,
so do we, and comment often
we form the team,
of elites,our skills exposing

Follow me,
the next piece is right behind
slowly see,
just you read between the lines
a comment leave,
criticize, on the structure or the rhyme
to keep alive,
a writers home, for bright new minds

Submitted on 2004-10-06 16:20:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  I liked this one not really sure why i do but i do lol
The rhythm and rhyme were good
Cant really pick at anything
| Posted on 2014-03-14 00:00:00 | by Teofila | [ Reply to This ]
  perhaps the writer's true emotion lies
coiled in a cavity behind the eye
of some bemused explorer
like heaven hovering o're a lover's kiss
we sing the song that whispered
I am the beginning of your bliss.
| Posted on 2012-05-21 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
  Good a flowing i like it alot,it speaks truth and like how jaycee said it comments on others works at the same time by haveing the reader recognize that theres other peoples works here as well, we work as an elite team of writers. Very good
| Posted on 2004-10-07 00:00:00 | by Spiritual Gifts | [ Reply to This ]
  I really liked it, although it seemed as if some of the commas were misplaced...or maybe I'm reading it wrong. In any case, I loved the message it gives about this truly fantastic site, and it's true, positive, and very nicely written. I think it is very important for sites like this to exist. I myself have discovered just how much talent by posess through interaction in this site with many other talented people, such as yourself. What a lovely tribute to such a lovely community.
| Posted on 2004-10-06 00:00:00 | by eener | [ Reply to This ]
  i don't like it. well written, sure, but...clichéd and tacky. just my opinion. honest commentary and all that. i think it's hopefull and happy without any substance.
| Posted on 2004-10-06 00:00:00 | by lukewarm | [ Reply to This ]
  you showcase your artistic ability in this piece, and I like it.
In the future I'd love to read more of your work.
good job.
| Posted on 2004-10-06 00:00:00 | by max | [ Reply to This ]
  I always like to read poems about the site, and really like that this one emphasisies reading and commenting on other's work. More people should not be afraid to say what they would change in a poem, no matter how personal they seem. It's how we learn and how we keep this community of writers alive.
Write on.
| Posted on 2004-10-06 00:00:00 | by jaycee | [ Reply to This ]
  True indeed. What better way to expand the mind more than stretching one's imagination and poetically documenting one's experiences.
| Posted on 2004-10-06 00:00:00 | by Cayman | [ Reply to This ]
  cool, you got off the rhyme scheme just a tad, but I enjoyed this, upbeat and flowing, and should make many want to post more, very nice...Bob:)
| Posted on 2004-10-06 00:00:00 | by poetryman | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?