Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Mother Naturedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Aken Sol
    Elite Ratio:    3.93 - 197/204/67
    Words: 91
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 895
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 686



    Description:
       Nature can be beautiful one minute, and ugly the next. Like human personalities....
    Aken Sol


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMother Naturedots
    -------------------------------------------


    You bless us with
    Fields of flowers, azure skies with
    Fluffy clouds and warm sunlight
    When youre happy
    With sheltering trees for shade
    And soft grass beds
    Nurturing us with luscious fruits

    Then you kill us
    With storms of
    Sand, water, thunder, ice
    Feeding us poison apples
    Disguised as food
    Tornados and hurricanes
    Floods and disease
    You bring us death
    When angry

    So we build walls
    To protect ourselves
    With our steel
    And skyscrapers
    We try to forget
    With our materials
    And we destroy
    Us both





    Submitted on 2004-10-08 18:58:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Well, i read this particular piece twice before I choose to comment. Overall you used good form and by doing this you kept your subject matter seperate and definitive
    | Posted on 2004-10-08 00:00:00 | by The Minister | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    27321

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry