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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: 12 Feetdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: solitary_cross
    ASL Info:    19/female/Philippines
    Elite Ratio:    3.4 - 92/107/24
    Words: 55
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 553
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 458



    Description:
       Actually, there is a story behind this poem. I saw on TV this girl who was staring at a pit where her grandfather will be buried. But then, out of depression, she jumped into the pit and was buried alive because they didn't notice that she was down there. Poor thing!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots12 Feetdots
    -------------------------------------------


    She stood there
    Unshakable ground
    Below her
    12 feet

    The cold presence
    Enveloped her
    Her consciousness
    Dwindling to its end

    Blood rushed
    Memories of her
    Washed away
    Drifted by the abyss

    Shadows danced
    Around her
    In a deep trance
    Eternal sleep

    She laid there
    Unshakable ground
    Above her
    12 feet




    Submitted on 2004-10-09 22:10:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
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    ||| Comments |||
      no words
    a story made into such a beautiful poem is really good,really expresses a lot about the truth of life
    the way u have written the poem its really gone into my memory and is unshakeable well i cant even imagine of being buried alive,but there are true instances of these things that have taken place
    lastly,
    this is one good poem that i have read in ages
    | Posted on 2007-08-16 00:00:00 | by SAMEER | [ Reply to This ]
      Tihs poem made me clauterphobic. Seriously. Having some trouble catching my breath here. Since most graves are 6 ft deep, I like how it seemed to depict that since two people were "at rest" there (even though one took a while) it was 12 feet. If that makes sense and what you were intending. Good.
    ~BCute
    | Posted on 2005-01-17 00:00:00 | by BCute | [ Reply to This ]
      this is one of those poems that if the reader wants they could themselves ruin by asking stupid questions of curiousity like. " what is she dead or something blatant like that" let's not ask and let's just embroid our elevated minds with the wonderful adorments the words give for once, please. i love the unshakeabel ground and the deafening finality of this write. it's exceptionally romantic and needs to only be admired. good job, love.
    | Posted on 2004-11-26 00:00:00 | by pioneerheart | [ Reply to This ]
      i can't imagine the horror of being buried alive. it would be the ultimate panic, fear, and you painted the picture in my head very well. very good. the last line- 12 feet. so... i don't know...abrupt? it ends there and thats it. i liked it thank you.
    | Posted on 2004-10-09 00:00:00 | by austin | [ Reply to This ]


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