Description: I would appreciate any general comments on the structure of the write. I wasn't too sure if this has worked so any improvements would be obliged.
You'll never know -------------------------------------------
You'll never know what it's like...
to know you'll never feel these things again...
I'll never wake up to your kiss or your arms around me ... stroking me, protecting me
I'll never be half asleep and feel you stroke my hair and kiss my head
I'll never tell you I love you when you're asleep to be suprised and hear you say it back ...
I love you too.
It hurts so much
You'll never come up behind me and give me a loving hug
You'll never stop me from going anywhere just to tell me you love me
You'll never tell me you miss me ... need me ... want me ...
It hurts so much
We'll never walk hand in hand like we have no cares in the world
We'll never look at the stars and tell each other our dreams
We'll never fall into each others eyes again knowing that we mean the world to each other
Another plus! I think that the structure and everything goes together. They were thoughts that you had and the way you put them down made me get on your level. Thoughts are all *&%^$#@$%^ (if that makes sense) so it's good to write the same way.
such a sad account of one who has left mentally, it hurts so much when you care deeply and it's not reciprocated, very nice explanation of such pain, ...Bob:)
having your heart broken really sucks! your emotions come through loud and clear... I liked it very much! is this to the same guy as "why" ? will be awaiting more posts! nice! TeddyD
I can see myself in this a little too much. I'm so sorry for what you must be feeling. It's hard to have something end when you feel you weren't done with it yet. Doesn't it kill you to be so affected by someone elses actions?
to hell with the rhyming! this was a fantastic write! can I say it? please? lol "Love is a misconception." lol I know- I know you don't believe it. but it sounded like a good response to this write.
Submission Name: You'll never know
