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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Star Brightdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: the apocrypha
    Elite Ratio:    3.37 - 185/192/48
    Words: 64
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 953
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 483



    Description:
       Twisted views on sex, aren't they?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsStar Brightdots
    -------------------------------------------


    You
    Angel fallen, your
    Wollen but rugged
    Skin pores
    Exhale tired songs
    And hiding your poisoned lungs
    Your breasts, those swinging little whores
    Bounce and bounce, and where you belong
    Is on the tv screen

    But it seems
    That your cradle of sex
    Demon-bitching under the latex
    Is about to fall apart
    Squeeking like a tart
    You'll know the pleasure
    Of destruction




    Submitted on 2004-10-18 20:17:16     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Hey there. Well, this is very different from anything I've read in a long time. Which is in itself, a very good thing. I'm not usually very fond of topics pertaining to sex in a darker way. But this piece is just close enough to the edge to be really good, but not so far overboard that it lacks taste. This piece makes me think of sexual impurity for some reason. In reading this, the idea of a woman that allows herself to be used comes to mind. It also makes me think of "dirty sex", you know, the kind of sex that's rough and quick, but full of intense passion and energy. The kind that you feel dirty about afterwards.

    Anyhoo...nice write here. Nothing I would suggest changing. Much love to ya.
    | Posted on 2005-02-28 00:00:00 | by Juliets_dagger | [ Reply to This ]
      "You
    Angel fallen" again a nice way to start the poem. I like the imagery in this piece.
    "and where you belong
    Is on the tv screen"
    it seems to me you admire this person almost but then the ending is such a surprise.
    Interesting look at thinks not so often mentioned
    Rubi
    | Posted on 2005-03-02 00:00:00 | by Rubi_Roja | [ Reply to This ]
      hmm, this was a different reading piece. has a lot of emotions involved within... and imagery, weird how sex can be viewed way to many different ways... but how true all those ways always seem to be. nice write
    | Posted on 2004-10-18 00:00:00 | by drkpoet | [ Reply to This ]


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