[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: An Invitationdots

    Author: brain
    ASL Info:    28/m/Miami FL
    Elite Ratio:    3.45 - 27/37/12
    Words: 125
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 872
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 792


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAn Invitationdots

    Seeing you in the depths of what is not,
    you wallow, as the time of your demise
    finally lands upon your own head,
    when once you surmised that it would
    land on the heads of others
    at your unforgiving bloody evil hands,
    in your sinister hell of time endless

    Satan seeks to cast his commanding spell
    on a host of the heavenly angels,
    only by God will he prevail

    but I know the secret of film

    God spun wars on planet earth,
    and the Devil and I were adversaries
    in this time of unknowing hypnotism,
    made battles and confrontations appear
    inside the eyes and ears of the cubic prism

    I invite you into the land of sad paradise.

    Submitted on 2004-10-22 18:59:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Television and film often causes one to find themselves inside of the movie, moving alongside the main character, fighting battles with them and feeling their emotions. It is paradise, because we get to live out our fantasies in these cubic boxes. And it is sad, because can't we find anything better to do?

    Very insightful, I really liked it. Television is indeed hypnotic, beckoning you to believe in the things it shows you. The first two stanzas sound like a movie that's going on in the television that you are watching, as if you are in the movie yourself. The best part was "time endless". That is such a cool expression.

    The style in this piece is very unique. You did well with it. The first two stanzas confused me just a little on what you were trying to get at, but I love the last parts of it, and all in all, you did a great job. Nicely done.
    | Posted on 2004-11-17 00:00:00 | by eener | [ Reply to This ]
      I found this very interesting. Although I could not find a meaning. I found no emotion. If you would spare the time would you share the motivation behind this piece?
    | Posted on 2004-10-22 00:00:00 | by isaiahc4 | [ Reply to This ]
      i have to agreee- alot of descriptive words- but what were they describing?? Almost sounds like one of my cousins on one of their acid trips...imagination at its best...
    | Posted on 2004-10-22 00:00:00 | by nicegurlintx | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Chasing The Lie written by jackz
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    By the bar written by expiring_touch
    Stretto written by saartha
    Legends written by poetotoe
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Limbo written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    All Time Low written by Janesaddiction
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]