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    dots Submission Name: Illusions Of Medots

    Author: darkness child
    ASL Info:    21/F/Michigan
    Elite Ratio:    3.07 - 195/266/48
    Words: 58
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 953
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 412

       Just something i wrote for art class. we had to draw a picture to illistrate a poem. i drew a girl in a tattered dress with tears streaming down her face. its a prety good drawing if i do say so myself. oh yeah the poem. um, just tell me what you think!

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    dotsIllusions Of Medots

    Theres a lonely little girl
    Lost inside my mind
    Through fantasy worlds
    Lost in my fake reality
    A helpless little child
    Her tattered dress shifting in an imaginary Breeze
    Reflecting her broken heart
    She pulls herself in close
    So as to not lose her sanity
    Hoping she'll be saved
    Because she knows this isn't reality

    Submitted on 2004-10-29 16:12:39     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      You wrote this really well. You wrote it so that the reader could actually picture what you were saying in the poem. It was well written and I dont think that I would change anything in it. keep it up.
    | Posted on 2004-10-29 00:00:00 | by FeelingAlive | [ Reply to This ]
      great write nice imagery you can feel yourself inside this person good work sad topic but thats where the best feelings awaken
    | Posted on 2004-10-29 00:00:00 | by sandman | [ Reply to This ]
      they way you wrote it, i can feel and even picture me in the same room as you. I like how you wrote where i can feel or even try to kind of fit and see what its like in your shoes. GET EM'
    | Posted on 2004-10-29 00:00:00 | by Fantasy_LilIvy | [ Reply to This ]
      I feel as if I know this little girl. I've heard her crying before. I know her so well because she is like the little girl inside of me. She keeps crying out. She's losing herself. But each passing moment I know is she is lost a little bit more. .. Anyways, on to the important stuff..
    Your work is solid. You never deviate from the subject at hand, her eternal sadness. I think its beatifully brooding.
    | Posted on 2004-10-29 00:00:00 | by batgirl | [ Reply to This ]
      i read this about 4 times and each time i could look deeper into the world of this little girl and see it through her eyes it was really good and i enjoyed this so much thanx good job
    | Posted on 2004-11-01 00:00:00 | by Themissingshado | [ Reply to This ]

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