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split personality

Author: Lachesis
ASL Info:    16,f,wi
Elite Ratio:    6.94 - 281 /69 /6
Words: 645
Class/Type: Misc /Misc
Total Views: 3753
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1666


I dont really know what the hell I was doin, I guess just thinking of split personalities.

split personality

I like the rain
I hate the rain.

You piss me off!
You piss me off.

You're an idiot.
You're the dumb one.

Yeah well your ugly

UHHHHHH!! you bitch,your the ugly one

You made me lose.

You did that on your own.

No you told me to go left.

Your other left.

Yeah well your the one without the body.

I get it in an hour.

Says who?


Who the hell are you?

Guess you idiot.

Why are you so mean to me?

Because you are weak.

I am not

am to


You wish, the truth is is that I am the strong one even now I could make you do anything I wanted.

Thats what you think.

Hey you idiots stop arguing, I have the body, and any second now I am going to make you go away with this onel ittle pill. You piss me off so bad, I black out and wake up and I did something wrong, or bad, and no one undersatnds, this is a problem with in my head.

Submitted on 2004-10-31 13:30:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
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  This piece sounds like my life in general. I never think I just act and I don't relize it till later.
This is a well writen piece. It could use better spelling, but only a jerk would count off on it for that. All together it's one of the best I've read all day.
| Posted on 2005-08-20 00:00:00 | by sageeriol | [ Reply to This ]
   Sounds like me before I wake up completely in the morning. Just kidding. But wow, seriously, I've never really read something like this. Let's just say it was interesting

Except I don't think split personalities talk to each other like that
But it's great how you had them randomly conflicting. I know someone with split personality, and it's really random. Not that random as to switch after every sentence, but it's random to know them well and then suddenly they're someone completely different. o_O...

And yay I finally commented on something of yours ;;;
| Posted on 2005-06-11 00:00:00 | by Spire | [ Reply to This ]
  Hah very good. It reminds me of a book I read The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer. It was very errie. It seemed in this poem that both your personalites were fighting against eachother. Both hating the other.If I were to dig deep in this piece (which I probably shouldnt ) it seems that both these pesonaliteis dont understand eachother or themselves and as a consequence creates somthing very different from the choas. Something that is intelligent but so lost inside
Well Goodbye From Medieval Aztec
P.S. you should read my stuff id really appreciate it
| Posted on 2005-01-27 00:00:00 | by Medieval Aztec | [ Reply to This ]
  i really liked where it was going. it was very cute and real. i didn't really like the last verse. i personally think it made it lose it's magic. oh well, good ideas.
| Posted on 2005-01-19 00:00:00 | by Lemmy | [ Reply to This ]
  Thys was funny as hell- and hell IS funny, I’ve been. 6th and last one out… Anyways- loved thys. We have the same conversation all the tyme, we do. I’m not sure who wins though…

Peace, love and cripples
| Posted on 2004-11-22 00:00:00 | by Six_Grey | [ Reply to This ]
  i immediately thought of Idenity the movie.
to be lost in ones own mind is a very overwhelming thought. even though i like the conversations among yourselfs i felt like there could have been more dept or distinctions between the personalities, to brighten up the dark labyrnith of your mind. i also felt like the extra spacing was unnecessarry and took away from the poem.
| Posted on 2004-11-11 00:00:00 | by elohimswork | [ Reply to This ]
  i thought that there was a lot of emotion, a lot of anger in that piece. i think that you should put one of the voices in quotation marks and the other voice,without. i thought that it was a good idea. keep it up.
| Posted on 2004-10-31 00:00:00 | by maquiladora | [ Reply to This ]
  hmmm. I'm not very fond of this piece though it was very origninal it seems more like an argument that a poem of any sort.
| Posted on 2004-10-31 00:00:00 | by DeadVoodooDoll | [ Reply to This ]
  its very chaotic and confusing. but you can certainly understand what is going on. the fact that it is chaotic and confusing makes perfect sense, since the subject is about split personalities, which in itself is overwhelmingly chaotic. I like the fact that there are no quotation marks. For me it seems to fit in perfectly that way. Since it was a view from the inside; you're talking to yourself from yourself consciously.. i imagined the conversation all bleeding together; blurring, messy, somewhat sinister. Thanks for sharing.
| Posted on 2004-10-31 00:00:00 | by batgirl | [ Reply to This ]
  You defiantely feel the emotions, the anger etc. I'm not sure how I feel about it though ... It didn't really provoke any emotions in me, in the end I found it quite boring. I'm not sure if the first line worked ... I like the rain, I hate the rain ... what's that about, you didn't need such a simple line to explain the conflict. Think the title needs changin aswell, it's not about split personalities.
| Posted on 2004-10-31 00:00:00 | by Star_searcher | [ Reply to This ]
  Hi this is jamal speaking:I think your poem is really creative I like that you chose this most interresting top...hold on i'l let you talk damn..sorry that was Jerome i'm gonna let him talk ok nice writting you i'll more of your stuff later. Wat up shoty this Jerome: This poem was aight I could've done better cause comming from someone who share's a body with other people I know M.P. it gets annoying and i'm ready to take...crap this sissy want's to talk to you so i'm gonna let him ok keep it real.
Holla Holla child this is Jamie: I love the creativity in this poem it's kinda weird knowing that there people out there like that isn't it? But you pulled the M.P. thing off real good and I give you props for that and that I look forward to reading more of your post but until then I'll just c ya later. Ok did you like my little skit good huh. 1 love - C. Flava ( The man who controls them all in 1 head lol)
| Posted on 2005-04-22 00:00:00 | by C. Flava | [ Reply to This ]

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