[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: God-Citydots

    Author: the apocrypha
    Elite Ratio:    3.37 - 185/192/48
    Words: 101
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1115
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 691

       Inspired by Cliver Barker's Imajica...

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Distorted lines
    Contours of a distant city
    Knots of tangled highways and sines
    So crippled that they deserve my pity

    Step up, little and humble man
    To untie the routine in this land
    Built on beliefs and religions
    Forgotten and locked in time
    Intricately flirting with the passions
    In the bondage fetish of the human mind

    Oh highways of love and avenues of lies
    Today so amazed by the impossible size
    Of this construction process
    Half accomplished and half exessed

    Love, loving the hearts
    Of those forever trapped in
    The city of God, the city of the Unseen

    Submitted on 2004-11-04 10:57:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Thys is the stuff that crack laced dreams are lyned with… Your works are ultra-violent and raw. Sweet! I'm working on reading the 2nd column...
    | Posted on 2004-11-04 00:00:00 | by Six_Grey | [ Reply to This ]
      Hmm...I'm not sure what to think of this yet...I love the way it was written and I'd love to read "Imajica" so that I might see where you derived the inspiration from...but I see no flaws in this piece at this point. Great job.
    | Posted on 2004-11-04 00:00:00 | by Juliets_dagger | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]