Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Tamara Tambourinedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Soulraven
    ASL Info:    31/Male/Illinois
    Elite Ratio:    4.05 - 510/481/142
    Words: 108
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 976
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 831



    Description:
       This is a song to a woman that i just met this fall.
    She was great, but understood me little. She loved the attention i gave her but loved little about me. She inspired me alot even though i knew she wouldn't let me close. So, to her i wrote this farewell.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTamara Tambourinedots
    -------------------------------------------


    There is a hidden song
    That grabs your ears
    Beating on the drum.
    It's the sweet melody
    of,
    Tamara Tambourine.

    It will sweep your soul
    Causing joy
    With ever rising note.
    It's the wondrous voice
    of,
    Tamara Tambourine.

    Mozart couldn't capture
    This grand sound.
    He couldn't dream
    Of such a ring
    As of this,
    Tamara Tambourine.

    No one has ever seen
    But only heard
    The lovely strum
    On their hearts
    Of the demi-nymph
    That is,
    Tamara Tambourine.

    In my dreams
    Her hips walk with chime
    Of lovely parables
    That touch my very soul
    Thus, I do sing
    To my,
    Tamara Tambourine.




    Submitted on 2004-11-04 15:56:16     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i thought that it was good. very deep and heartfelt. i liked the repition of the words Tamara Tambourine. it added a good feeling to the piece. i thought that it was well written and was a pleasure to read. i liked it. keep it up.
    | Posted on 2004-11-04 00:00:00 | by maquiladora | [ Reply to This ]
      great post soulraven. i loved the way you tie the name in, very skillful of course. i love your use of simile- demi- nymph i especially liked. was she unbelievable? dont you just know she was. great post.
    -Q
    | Posted on 2004-11-04 00:00:00 | by TechnoticQ | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    30918

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Love written by saartha
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Cover written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    The World written by jjd
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    untitled written by ShyOne
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry