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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Slumberdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: curiosityskitty
    ASL Info:    30/F/TN
    Elite Ratio:    3.2 - 145/149/30
    Words: 93
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 494
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 588



    Description:
       I was really bored at work this AM

    There is really not a good 'type' for this.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSlumberdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Pray the Lord your soul to keep
    And bless the one's you love
    Pray as you lay down to sleep
    To heaven up above

    Rest your tired eyes my son
    And slowly drift away
    Vivid dreams have just begun
    To lead your mind astray

    Dream of lands both far and wide
    Or what you wish to be
    Dream not of tears which you have cried
    Just set your worries free

    Sleep my love in pleasant dreams
    With unencumbered trust
    Sleep in silver moonlight beams
    And bathed in slumbers dust




    Submitted on 2004-11-05 07:48:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Much, much, much better and so easy is the flow even a child like me might memorize it.
    Now, add some pictures and ther you have a very good little tyke book.
    | Posted on 2004-11-05 00:00:00 | by Clayton | [ Reply to This ]
      i love this write. the meter and scheme are excellent, it left me wanting more. i love the rhymes you chose, mixed with the adjectives you chose. they are some of the most perfect combos i have seen in a long long while. great write here, i liked it a lot.
    -Q
    | Posted on 2004-11-05 00:00:00 | by TechnoticQ | [ Reply to This ]
      Your eyes must have really been heavy to be writing Bedtime prayers in the morning.
    So where is this going? A childrens book or into private keepsakes for the future?
    Great thoughts, the lines might read better for children if they had a little more rhyme.
    But overall a great job, looking for more.
    | Posted on 2004-11-05 00:00:00 | by Clayton | [ Reply to This ]
      you know... if someone said stuff like this to me when i was trying to sleep im sure id make more of an effort to actually sleep... this is gorgeous!
    kinda has a "as i lay me down to sleep i pray dear lord my soul to keep" kinda feel but theres nothing about dying before waking... this is all about releasing fears and no more tears but happily ever afters... a world far better than what we've had... dream big for they'll come true... i love it!
    | Posted on 2004-11-08 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]



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