Clicking Through Pictures -------------------------------------------
As I clicked through pictures of you on my computer,
I stopped to take a sip of tea.
The cursor was poised below your eye like a tear.
I needed to hold you across the countless miles;
asigh escaped at the impossibility.
This is such a short poem, but recites a story in all its entirety. I can even wholesemly feel the great distance of you and your love, and how bitter it is to have someone, to know that you can be holding that person at the moment, but the person is too far away to make that possible. I'm very apologetic for the distance between you and the person if it is for real. But if you two stay strong, you'll make it through.
Sad little moment. I'm guessing this actually happened. It seems so specificly original. I love little frozen snipits like this described...it brings the significance to a seemingly insignificant moment to life. The cursor on his face...the tea...you captured the "Impossibility" well just with the implication of the scene described.
The tense on the last line is fine, "sigh" is personfied and is acting. Mais Oui? I love the line anyway. And this is truly what writing is about, noticing an event as synchronicity and getting it down. I'm sorry you miss your baby, hope you can be with him soon. The word "poised" fits, it reflects gentleness. "Hold you across the miles" I like too.
I disagree with L...(not about the tense-thing, which I assume you have corrected) the last line not only makes sense to me but is the perfect ending to this. I suppose it is all in the interpretation of the reader, and I can relate strongly to the feelings described in this piece.