such a disgrace
|
|
Description:
something that just came to me when i was watchin this screwed up movie on lifetime....(its sad....i know....) not completly done yet, so ne ideas/feedback would be greatly appreciated
thx
thx
such a disgrace
tears stained his face like the blood on his sleeve he dropped the knife and walked over to me he fell to his knees and put his hands to his face he mumbled a few words he was such a disgrace "why did you do it?" i asked in dismay "i couldnt help myself" was all he could say i took a few steps back as he regained his stregnth he was up on his feet but the tears still stained his face he was such a disgrace so he killed his true love his high school sweetheart she had lost all interest all things fell apart he couldnt help the pain so he knew what had to be done to end her life before it really begun... |
Submitted on 2004-11-08 16:39:17 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post
Comments
| I sort of disagree with BCute. Well, it did flow very well until I came to this stanza: "i took a few steps back as he regained his stregnth he was up on his feet but the tears still stained his face he was such a disgrace" The extra line just threw off the whole rhythm. | Posted on 2004-11-08 00:00:00 | by Lipgl0ssed | [ Reply to This ] | This flowed very well and had some strong emotional pulls even though it came from a movie. I'd like to know the movie you watched. Would like to see what caused such a good write. | | Posted on 2004-11-08 00:00:00 | by BCute | [ Reply to This ] | |
31534