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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: What Hidesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Raksha
    ASL Info:    16/female
    Elite Ratio:    2.45 - 75/67/29
    Words: 62
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 309
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 385



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhat Hidesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    It's the hell I live in,
    It's the place you call life.
    The life I hate to live in,
    and the one you love.
    We all live in different lives,
    but one thing we will
    all find ourselves-By ourselves
    is when death comes upon us
    and looks us in the eyes,
    and says its time.
    Its time for your destruction and demise.




    Submitted on 2004-11-08 19:08:15     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Its needs some rearranging...but the overall thought behind it is marvelous. I love it. Remember it isn't always what you say, its how you choose to say it that can really count the most. much love to ya my dear.
    | Posted on 2004-11-08 00:00:00 | by Juliets_dagger | [ Reply to This ]
      i agree with the first comment. i think that if you rearranged the working a bit it could be much better. repitition can be a powerful tool, but sometimes it can be too overdone. the rhyme also seems a bit forced and it was kind of hard to follow.
    | Posted on 2004-11-08 00:00:00 | by bite my lip | [ Reply to This ]



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