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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: What Motivation?dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Kalidoscopeeyes
    ASL Info:    18/f
    Elite Ratio:    3.64 - 122/151/29
    Words: 129
    Class/Type: Poetry/Me
    Total Views: 1023
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 854



    Description:
       I was sitting in Algebra class and it suddenly all felt so pointless.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhat Motivation?dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Why do I keep doing this to myself?
    What makes me get up every morning
    And do it all over again?
    Why can't today be any different?
    I could pack my bags and hit the road,
    Leave that empty-hearted dream of psychology behind.
    I'll become a sort of rolling stone,
    And go wherever that beautiful wind tells me to go.
    I'd disentangle myself from this maze
    Where individuality is shunned
    And science and technology reign over all.
    Or maybe I'll continue to sit here,
    Allowing my creativity to slowly die out
    Until there is only a flicker of a flame left.
    That sounds more like me.
    That's just what I'll do,
    Just like every other day.
    Maybe I'll try to solve this equation
    And let myself die a little.




    Submitted on 2004-11-12 19:17:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Algebra. *shudder* I know the feeling, hon. And this dropped me right back into highschool... I HATED algebra. :D I'm a terminally-creative type myself, so I understand. I will tell you though.... sticking through it until you get to college is worth it. College is SO different it's almost unbelievable. Talk about culture shock. Just make sure you get into a major YOU want, not something your parents want for you.

    Okay, now for the poem! :D I'm not usually big on whole pieces in freeverse, but this was pretty cool. It flowed like poetry, but w/o the stiltedness that is the pitfall of rhyme. You also did well capturing that essence of being in highschool... the desire to charge off into that limitless horizon and explore this amazing world... leaving the walls and sealed windows behind forever. Well done, Kalidoscopeeyes. <><
    | Posted on 2004-11-22 00:00:00 | by WorththeWait | [ Reply to This ]
      lol, oh wow...i knew doctor goldenberg is boring, but this is awesome. i really enjoyed this piece of feeling trapped in the monotonous thing i call life and how you want to escape, but you decide to stay a little longer, tell yourself that maybe, just maybe it will be different tomorrow. and know it wont be.
    i really enjoyed this though. it was a piece i understood and liked much. lol
    ~!~Luvs, pac
    | Posted on 2004-11-16 00:00:00 | by Catie O Daniels | [ Reply to This ]
      Merry Meet Eyes. (I can't spell well enough to write your entire name, sorry) What a cool poem. Isn't it neat how such mundaune situations inspire us to write the deepest things? I liked the style of your writing. Your words were great and drew me into my own memories. I can remember sitin in class thinking the same things. You even capitolized the begining of each line. I don't see that as much as I would like here. You punctuated correctly too. So in short I am quite impressed. Blessed Be Andrea
    | Posted on 2004-11-12 00:00:00 | by magickandie | [ Reply to This ]
      i'm apathetic too. and i keep thinking that someday i'll just drive off. but i never do. i think you should seperate the last four lines from the rest of the poem, cause they have a different idea and tone fromt he rest of it, and the line "that sounds more like me" is powerful enough that it needs some silence after it. it could be a poem without the last lines and still be good, but then you'd lose the equation metaphor and the stifling algebra class setting. really depressing. really...really...depressing.
    | Posted on 2004-11-29 00:00:00 | by lukewarm | [ Reply to This ]


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