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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: family ties.dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: words_can_heal
    ASL Info:    22 Female
    Elite Ratio:    3.56 - 79/111/22
    Words: 152
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 696
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1062



    Description:
       Have a read. Lemme know how you like it. true to my life.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsfamily ties.dots
    -------------------------------------------


    No clothes.
    Have you got your Identification?
    No? Okay. What do you have?
    Just those clothes you're wearing?
    And no bags.
    That beaten up face.
    Is that from the epilepsy?
    That bottle of alcohol...
    You're bringing that with us?
    Hello...I'm your sister.
    I was only little.
    Just a baby really.
    Hey...is he okay?
    Why is he shaking like that.
    Oh...the epilepsy...
    Must be from the booze.
    The years of abuse.
    The gang fights.
    Thats my big brother.
    Ten years alone.
    Ten long years on this harsh pavement.
    Where are his family?
    I am his family.
    I'm his sister.
    That's my big brother.
    He's a mess.
    A tragedy.
    An alcoholic.
    A waste of time.
    He's homeless.
    Yes...he's my big brother.
    We just found him.
    And we're bringing him home.
    That's my big brother.
    Can I be proud?




    Submitted on 2004-11-13 03:29:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is an awsome piece. I like it's rambling nature. "that botle of alcohol your bringing that with us?" Perhaps one of the most intersting line. This feels choppy like you took all the unessecary words and tossed them into the garbage disposal. be blessed.
    peace
    | Posted on 2004-11-13 00:00:00 | by shaman | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow... I can truly feel your emotions through this poem. It was written in a simple but very tender and touching way. It tugged at my heartstrings. I like the way you describe the confusion that you may be facing... should you be proud? Or disappointed? Sad? The questions linger a while in the reader's head... which means it really had an impact on me. I'm really sorry to hear about this... I hope things will change for the better for you.
    | Posted on 2004-11-13 00:00:00 | by zhi wei | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow.

    I'm not sure what to say about this one.

    I'm sorry you're feeling like this. I'm usually longer winded when it comes to my comments but I'm honestly lost for words right now.

    That bottle of alcohol...
    You're bringing that with us?

    I'm not sure what that means to you, but I know exactly how that feels to me at this point in my life.

    Good write and I hope you feel better soon.

    Rob
    | Posted on 2004-11-13 00:00:00 | by Me Rambling | [ Reply to This ]


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