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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Sleep Welldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Me Rambling
    Elite Ratio:    5.91 - 279/319/51
    Words: 236
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Love
    Total Views: 1242
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1315



    Description:
       
    I'm. Not. A. Poet.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSleep Welldots
    -------------------------------------------


    There's some things that I just can't say to your face. So instead, I'll talk to you in your sleep.

    I've been hiding these feelings from you for so long. You've always been my true definition of perfection. I've held you in such high regards, but you initimidate me; this I can admit.

    But how would you react if you knew I felt this way about you?
    Would you believe me if I said you are the meaning of my life?
    Would you care if I told you I once had dreams of you being my wife?
    If you knew that was the truth, would it scare you?

    I know you're happy already. I know you're what they call "taken." Would it bother you if I said "I love you?"

    What I wouldn't give to sell my heart to you; my perfect picture of serenity.
    You truely are amazing; you truely are my unrequited love.

    I cannot say these things to your face, with your eyes wide open. Truthfully, I think it's best you didn't even know. So I'll leave you with the softest kiss on your unparted lips, and run my fingers through your hair, as I wish deep down that your unconscious heart knows that I care.

    Sleep well, love. You can never know.




    Submitted on 2004-11-15 21:05:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      this is really very beautiful and poignant. it reminded me a little of the scene at the end of The Sixth Sense when he (who is dead) talks to her while she is sleeping... it hurts so much when you love someone you know you cannot have. i like the line, "I wish deep down that your unconscious heart knows that I care..." perhaps she does... i would almost call this prose instead of a random thought. bittersweet, this is.
    | Posted on 2004-12-12 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      This was amazing! I can relate. I fell in love with my best friend, and just recently, Wednesday to be exact, told him. I wrote a letter, and then read it to him, along with my poem "Blind". He hasn't said anything about it except that it won't change our friendship. He actually brought the subject up w/o knowing it. Long story, let me know if you want details. Anyway, that was amazing, and I think it would melt any girl's heart (I know it would melt mine). But it may not be the time to tell her. It may never be...
    | Posted on 2004-11-20 00:00:00 | by AngelOutlaw | [ Reply to This ]
      Dude that wuz the sweetest thing ever. I wish somebody would tell me that while I'm sleeping. I'm sure some part of me would hear it, I might not remember it when I woke up, but it would surely envoke a smile on my sleeping lips. I understand the way you feel though... sometimes you just can't tell someone what you truly think about them, and that can drive you crazy, I know. Maybe since you wrote this something changed and she knows how you feel... perhaps? Let me know
    | Posted on 2004-11-18 00:00:00 | by WaxingPoetic | [ Reply to This ]
      Ahhh-- I love this. This is such a profound piece... I can feel the longing withing. You made this piece so romantic, ahhhhh! You are an awesome writer!!!! There are no words to describe the passion that this piece brings out in me. I just, I can not tell yo how much I ADORE this piece. I can relate (or at least feel that i can) Seriously, this has left me almost speechless but instead I can only ramble on about how good I think it is.
    The second time I got done reading this I had to close my eyes and take a deep sigh, just at the thought of such passion. I know that many people tend to water down their emotions when writing, and if you do I can't even comprehend what is going on in yor head. As far as I am concerned, this is PERFECT the way it is. I LOVE it... It is so sad, keeping those words to yourself and letting them bounce and rocochet around your skull for so long. I wish the best for you and her, even if it may take a while. In my perspective, if you like somebody that much it should not be a secret, even if that means risking the person you love so much. If they love you in return, they would either have mutual feelings or at least not let what you two have change for the worse. Kind of like the mask comment that you left me. It's wrong to wear a mask and pretend that you are indifferent towards them. You shoudl try to communicate and resolve anything that is unclear. I really shouldn't be the one to tell you about this because I haven't taken your advice on talking to the person who still has my friends heart-- but I am working my way to that point when I feel comfortable talking to him about it. (Or at least to the point when he wont blow me off if I try...) Ahh sorry for getting a little off task here... I (obviously) have ADD. One time LOOK A BUTTERFLY! BUTTERFLYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

    okay I'm back.. And that was a cheesy joke to dig myself out of the hole that I had dug myself in to. I still have to go though... OOH LOOK! -Hillarbutterflyyy...............
    | Posted on 2004-11-18 00:00:00 | by falloutgirl | [ Reply to This ]
      well in one sense you wont get hurt ,.in another she may not be as happy as you think. It's really hard when a single person falls for someone taken cause if their married 9 out of 10x .they will play but will never be yours even if they give you there hearty for a little while.it hurts when they know how you feel and if they have a problem they run to you giving you false hope that someday they will stay,in the end you wish you had never told them cause you sometimes get played like a yoyo.
    | Posted on 2005-01-03 00:00:00 | by wildheart | [ Reply to This ]
      As many of the comments stated before mine, this is very romantic. It gives me chills! I know the feeling of loving someone who is 'taken' already. I think the whole tone of this is very sincere and loving. This is very different from some of the writes I've read from you but it just proves that you can write good about any subject. This part really caught me,
    "So I'll leave you with the softest kiss on your unparted lips, and run my fingers through your hair, as I wish deep down that your unconscious heart knows that I care."
    Sometimes just knowing that someone cares can mean the world to a person. You showed us a very compassionate side and that takes a lot. Great write.
    -blt
    | Posted on 2004-11-16 00:00:00 | by borderlinetears | [ Reply to This ]
      hmmm...so deep feelings...a tragic realization that she can never know...kinda in a predicaments simular to that rite now...could use some advice, but oh well. I think that...well, maybe she knows a bit of how you feel? What exactly is your definition of *taken*?

    ->Dark
    | Posted on 2004-11-16 00:00:00 | by drk_angl_17 | [ Reply to This ]
      Aw, that's so sweet, teeth rottingly so, but I like it. I like the punning in "unconscious heart." I think we've all done this, whether to a picture, someone sleeping, or just writing it in a journal.
    | Posted on 2004-11-16 00:00:00 | by cuddledumplin | [ Reply to This ]
      Another great one. Seriously. Makes me want to stop with my dik and fart jokes and lashing out w/ swears and actually write out my feelings in a deep and thoughtful manner lyke thys. …Makes me want to, but I won’t. Lolfull- Oh, I’m terrific! Anyways- for serious, I lyke your work a lot. And even though that does not mean anything- there it is… ~#6-
    | Posted on 2004-11-16 00:00:00 | by Six_Grey | [ Reply to This ]
      that is really sweet.. i like how well thought out your feelings are.. i am always a jumble of feelings. I can relate to how you feel though.. although i am not married and have feelings for someone else i have a boyfriend and he is my very first long time one.. yet i have a friend who is always around me and i developed feelings for him. well i hope that either your feelings dissapate or you can get with this love of yours taken or not. good luck with wherever your life leads you.
    ~*~amber~*~
    | Posted on 2004-11-16 00:00:00 | by rocknpoetrychik | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, this really made me all warm and fuzzy inside. I'd like to have a conversation sometime on what/who this poem is about. Maybe one of our question/answer sessions. Good write. I love the love I feel rediating from it. And, I haven't felt true love like that, from a poem, in a while.
    | Posted on 2004-11-16 00:00:00 | by BCute | [ Reply to This ]
      Sweet write. I love what you said to her, every word from the heart, and I hurt for you. Don't we all know what it's like to love from afar. But here's what's true, you won't tell her, and love's finest pleasure is always in giving. You have a beautiful secret love that is eternal and won't ever cause you pain. I'm glad I read this. Great work. peace, nansofasthttp://www.eliteskills.com/yay.gif
    | Posted on 2004-11-17 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
      Rob I love this piece, but I'm so curious,who is the sleeping beauty that you are oh so enraptured in? Is it the same individual that most of your pieces are about? have you ever considered just telling her? But maybe they're right...maybe it is best that she doens't know, that way you don't get hurt...but how will you know if you don't try?

    luv ya
    Jaymi
    | Posted on 2004-12-06 00:00:00 | by theDevilsPocket | [ Reply to This ]


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